It’s a question I think we’ve all wrestled with at some point in our lives.
Creatives (and I’ll be honest, that word makes me cringe a little, but I don’t think it’s unique to authors. I think it really does apply to everyone who creates in one way or another — up to and including having created a family) seem to struggle with it a little bit more. Maybe this is because our soul is out there on display in little bits and pieces when we share our work.
I know in my own life, I’ve had many periods where I have struggled with feeling not enough. It can be fun to delve into the psychology of birth order and personality type and enneagram and all the other things that are out there that people embrace to help us understand a little bit more about ourselves. And none of that is, I think, wrong. At least not on its own.
It can become a problem, though, if we let it steal our hearts and minds away from looking to the One who knows the true answer to all of life’s questions to give us guidance, reassurance, and completeness.
And it’s that quest that I look at my characters–my heroines in particular–and see across the board. They all struggle to feel that they’re enough. To believe that they are valuable “as is.”
And inevitably, as it does for us in real life, this leads to heartache.
The heroine of my most recent book, Her Billionaire Benefactor, is Wendy Hall. She’s the older sister, but she’s always felt as though her younger sister outshone her. Not necessarily in good ways, but even so, Wendy never felt like she had her parents’ attention. So she strove to be perfect. To prove to them–to herself–that was enough. And so she married and had kids and stayed in her hometown and did everything she was supposed to do. And she had that perfect life. On the outside.
But her perfect life wasn’t actually perfect, and, in fact, it made her feel even more strongly that she couldn’t–wouldn’t–ever measure up.
And then, if you’ve read The Billionaire’s Nanny, you know she lost it all. (It’s kind of a spoiler, but it’s not huge for that story. Or for this one.) Her husband and kids were taken from her. Her life was nearly taken from her. And now, a year later, Wendy is struggling more than ever with the question, “Am I enough?”
There are other themes and other reasons Wendy and Preston have to grow and change as they find their way toward love. And this one might not be one that reaches out and smacks you on the head when you read the book — but I hope it’s one that, if you contemplate the story a little more, you see.
More than that, I hope that if this is something you struggle with in your own life, that you will hear me when I tell you yes. Yes, you are enough. Right now, exactly as you are, you are enough. Because you are the person God created you to be. You are uniquely positioned for the life that you have. Good or bad. Hard or easy. No matter what comes.
[I can’t actually think of a good question that really relates super well to all of the above (so yeah, bad blogging plan, Elizabeth. Ooops.) Instead, I’m going to invite your thoughts this way. Her Billionaire Benefactor, along with my Billionaire Next Door series, is written in alternating first person POV. I will honestly admit that for a long time I used to scoff at first person. But the more I read it, the more I loved it, and now it’s rapidly becoming a favorite. What are your thoughts on first vs third POV?]