Please note: I know that it is spelled idyllic. Forgive me a little punny subject line!
I watched the new season of American Idol on and off this year, and Maddie and Caleb were always 2 of my favorites. My romantic-leaning heart just about jumped and cheered when they let the cat out of the bag right before the American Idol was announced that they were indeed a “couple.” How SWEET!
But what I also thought was SUPER DUPER sweet was that after the show, he told Ryan Seacrest that it was really cool to be in second place, because I got to watch Maddie win. (Source)
<insert Krista swoon>
It is such a great example of how a quality relationship should be. Wanting something good for someone you love–even more than you want it for yourself.
I remember when my hubby and I were dating. My family is a HUGE lover of playing games, and I am insanely competitive. Yeah, I like to win, y’all. But my slightly neurotic behavior aside, we were playing I believe Phase 10 with my extended family and it was Scott’s turn. He KNEW I needed a certain card… we could all sense his indecision as to whether or not to discard it so I could pick it up. Our relationship was still VERY new at that point, and my family was all telling him he better not play it.
He played it.
Now, part of me will say, I don’t want anyone to “let” me win a game. But that sweet man risked the yells of the rest of my family (which definitely came…) and sacrificed his own win for me. Not because he didn’t want me to complain about losing (he didn’t know me well enough to know that would come…) but because he cared more about making me smile than he did about winning. It is a cheezy example, I know. But one that still to this day sticks with me.
Now, almost 20 years later, I look back and see how important valuing the happiness of the other would become in our marriage. When I got homesick and was struggling shortly after our wedding, he willingly left his family to move me back home to my own. When, a few years later, he felt God calling him to a music school that was far away from BOTH of our families, I agreed to leave all I knew and go on the journey with him. From job changes to so many things, our journey has been full of moments of love and sacrifice.
Lest you think our marriage is perfect and we have it all together, be assured there has been a lot of selfishness too. Times when we fought for our own way and it ended badly. Times when we put more emphasis on what our spouse was lacking or not giving to the other rather than what WE weren’t giving to our spouse. But at our core, we’ve always come back to the idea of laying down our pride and wanting GOOD for the one we love.
And it isn’t limited to just marital relationships either.
Philippians 2:3 (NIV) says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”
There is such value in putting others first, in both romantic and real-life relationships.
Of course, Jesus is the ultimate example of this. He could have uttered just a word to stop his own suffering, but he loved us so much that he took our punishment so we could have eternal life with him. It’s a sacrifice that will always take my breath away!
Let’s Chat!
What’s something selfless someone has done for you? What’s something you’ve sacrificed for someone you love?
Please note: I fully understand there are relationships where abuse is present, and while I still think sacrifice is important, so is your safety. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do for the other is to set a boundary and remove yourself from a harmful situation so they can get the help they need.
Krista Phillips writes inspirational romance with a dash of smiles. She believes a sprinkle of laughter (and a wee bit of chocolate) makes everything a little better! She blogs regularly about life as a wife, mother, follower of Jesus, and mother of a child with a rare congenital heart defect at www.kristaphillips.com. She is represented by Sarah Freese of WordServe Literary.
My mom made oodles of sacrifices over the years for me. This I know. I could never be a mom.
Thanks for sharing your story. It’s a great reminder of how we should be living and loving every day.
I moved from caring for my parents to be with my husband.
Love is wanting and bringing about the best, for those we love. Which can mean putting limits on what we do/allow them to do.
Sweet post, Krista! My sweet husband is always trying to outdo me by giving me the last piece or the biggest one, buying me something when he wanted something else. But I do the same for him. He has taught me what sacrifice means.
This is a beautiful example, thank you for sharing! We always struggle with the day to day likenesses, this past year I starting a little notebook and literally wrote the day and time I noticed a simple kindness from my hubs, whether it was taking out the trash or picking up dinner, gasing up my car, you name it.
I surprised him with it when it was full and he was stunned to realize how much all those little things meant to me!
Love your Phase 10 story! My husband washed the dishes every night for 6 months so I could practice Morse code and learn it enough to get my amateur radio license!
Hi Krista! Thanks for your inspiring blog. For 20 years I sacrificed my free time during the sandwich years to care for my parents with my husband’s support. Now some days, especially during the summer months Monday thru Thursday, I sacrifice my sanity caring for my grandchildren ages 12, 10, 4, and 16 months. As an immigrant, growing up without grandparents, I enjoy being an intricate part of their lives. One advantage is I can send them home to their parents at the end of the day. I have enjoyed watching them mature and grow and become independent. Also glad the oldest feels free to call us when he wants to interact with us. Best wishes and happy writing.
Hi Krista,
I always make sure my son and husband have plenty to eat and drink. If there are only two servings of a leftover dish, I let them have it. If there are only two glasses of tea, I drink water. I guess that’s pretty much a wife/mom thing.
My husband does most of the errand running since got deadlines. It’s a big help when I’m in a time crunch. And he puts coffee in my hand in the morning because he knows I’m a zombie until I’ve had caffeine.
Sometimes, it’s the small things.
I’m a mom of 4! I can say it is worth all of my sacrifices!!
Agreed!!
Caring for your parents involves sacrifice too! :-)
Agreed. It is a fine line though, as limits are subjective and are at times based on personal trials we have gone through. We must be careful with that, as there are some spouses in particular who have become controlling and unreasonable trying to “limit” the other, and that can be dangerous and self serving in the long run.
On the flip side, in cases of dealing with a controlling or abusive spouse, putting limits and boundaries may be a loving thing in that case.
That is too sweet!!!
That is such a good idea!!!!
That is very sweet!!! My husband has sacrificed much for my writing career!
That’s a great story!
Agreed!! I need to remember that in my day to day living that the small things matter too!!
Thanks for sharing your story with us. something selfless that someone has done for me is leaving another job that this person had and took care of myself, along with my husband.