Please note: I know that it is spelled idyllic. Forgive me a little punny subject line!
I watched the new season of American Idol on and off this year, and Maddie and Caleb were always 2 of my favorites. My romantic-leaning heart just about jumped and cheered when they let the cat out of the bag right before the American Idol was announced that they were indeed a “couple.” How SWEET!
But what I also thought was SUPER DUPER sweet was that after the show, he told Ryan Seacrest that it was really cool to be in second place, because I got to watch Maddie win. (Source)
<insert Krista swoon>
It is such a great example of how a quality relationship should be. Wanting something good for someone you love–even more than you want it for yourself.
I remember when my hubby and I were dating. My family is a HUGE lover of playing games, and I am insanely competitive. Yeah, I like to win, y’all. But my slightly neurotic behavior aside, we were playing I believe Phase 10 with my extended family and it was Scott’s turn. He KNEW I needed a certain card… we could all sense his indecision as to whether or not to discard it so I could pick it up. Our relationship was still VERY new at that point, and my family was all telling him he better not play it.
He played it.
Now, part of me will say, I don’t want anyone to “let” me win a game. But that sweet man risked the yells of the rest of my family (which definitely came…) and sacrificed his own win for me. Not because he didn’t want me to complain about losing (he didn’t know me well enough to know that would come…) but because he cared more about making me smile than he did about winning. It is a cheezy example, I know. But one that still to this day sticks with me.
Now, almost 20 years later, I look back and see how important valuing the happiness of the other would become in our marriage. When I got homesick and was struggling shortly after our wedding, he willingly left his family to move me back home to my own. When, a few years later, he felt God calling him to a music school that was far away from BOTH of our families, I agreed to leave all I knew and go on the journey with him. From job changes to so many things, our journey has been full of moments of love and sacrifice.
Lest you think our marriage is perfect and we have it all together, be assured there has been a lot of selfishness too. Times when we fought for our own way and it ended badly. Times when we put more emphasis on what our spouse was lacking or not giving to the other rather than what WE weren’t giving to our spouse. But at our core, we’ve always come back to the idea of laying down our pride and wanting GOOD for the one we love.
And it isn’t limited to just marital relationships either.
Philippians 2:3 (NIV) says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”
There is such value in putting others first, in both romantic and real-life relationships.
Of course, Jesus is the ultimate example of this. He could have uttered just a word to stop his own suffering, but he loved us so much that he took our punishment so we could have eternal life with him. It’s a sacrifice that will always take my breath away!
What’s something selfless someone has done for you? What’s something you’ve sacrificed for someone you love?
Please note: I fully understand there are relationships where abuse is present, and while I still think sacrifice is important, so is your safety. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do for the other is to set a boundary and remove yourself from a harmful situation so they can get the help they need.