February is a month all about love. It seems like there are hearts and cupids everywhere you look. I’m not sure if it’s appropriate for a romance writer to admit this, but Valentine’s Day has never been one of my favorite holidays. I know, I know. . .I, of all people, am supposed to LOVE love.
And I do.
But I guess maybe I don’t always love the commercialization of Valentine’s Day and the pressure to get/give a gift. I remember in middle school and junior high when the day would be filled with deliveries to classrooms. Flowers, stuffed animals, balloons. . .there was a lot of pressure back then to receive something, and I can remember all too well the disappointment the years when my name wasn’t called.
That “pressure” seemed to remain even after I entered the workforce. The day was always full of flowers or special deliveries. I’ve seen co-workers serenaded by barbershop quartets and surprised by horse-drawn carriage rides. . .all very cool and sweet and definitely romance novel-worthy.
This year, my husband took me out to dinner at our favorite place. There wasn’t a big surprise because he knows I’d rather be surprised on a regular day. Maybe a special anniversary—our first date. The day he knew he loved me. The day he proposed. A regular day would make the surprise even more unexpected.
I don’t think I’ve ever written a Valentine’s Day surprise into one of my books, so maybe I should try that in the future. I’ve covered a lot of holidays, but never Valentine’s. In one of my very first books, Love is a Battlefield, Ace surprises Kristy with a bouquet of sparklers because she had to miss out on the 4th of July festivities. I loved writing that scene!
How about you? Do you love Valentine’s Day and look forward to it each year? (I know lots of people who consider that their favorite day.) Or do you dislike it? (I had a friend in college who used to wear black each year on Valentine’s Day and send out anti-Valentine’s cards!) Or are you more like me and fall somewhere in between?
Whichever camp you fall into, I hope you are having a fantastic February. Spring is just around the corner!!
Annalisa Daughety writes contemporary fiction set in historic locations, including the Walk in the Park series, Love Finds You in Charm, Ohio, and A Wedding to Remember in Charleston, South Carolina. She lives in Arkansas and is hard at work on her next book.
A thought provoking blog. I now understand why people dislike Valentine’s Day. In elementary school Valentine’s Day is more inclusive when everyone receives cards and has a fun day. That changes in high school with cookie and flower fundraisers. As a retired high school teacher I saw what happened, the popular kids received the cookies and flowers. Usually they also the funds to do so (in our school some students lived in million dollar mansions on the shores of Lake Michigan, while others lived in trailers). When a regular kid, received something they were made fun of or badgered to reveal from whom. I do not remember these fundraisers when I was in high school in the 1960s.
I am with you it is fun to be surprised out of the blue with a small bouquet of flowers, my favorite pastry, a walk along the beach, or a meal out – maybe even a picnic. Spring is in the air – yesterday it was 63 degrees in SW Michigan and we took a road trip to our favorite restaurant with the back windows and sun roof open a crack.
I had to laugh about your friend who wore black on Valentine’s Day, Annalisa. Here in the US, Valentine’s Day is so commercialized and it’s true meaning lost. I believe every day should we should stay focused on love. Happy Weekend!
These days, my husband and I usually give a little something to our family, instead of giving something to each other for Valentine’s Day. We show our love for each other every day and we have been married almost 37 years. We are more in love every day. :-) This year, I made chocolate chip cookies for the family. :-)
Valentine’s Day is special every year for me because it’s my wedding anniversary. We celebrated 40 years with a very low key day. We bought steaks and grilled them. We learned long ago that going out on Valentine’s Day isn’t always the best day to go out. We also get something for our house rather than for each other. This year it was a washer and dryer. In my book, FALLING FOR THE MILLIONAIRE, that is coming out on March 22, I have a Valentine’s Day scene. The hero and heroine are serving at a Valentine banquet for a group of senior citizens, and the hero has a special surprise for the heroine. Earlier in the book she shows him the bell tower in the church she attends. The bell doesn’t ring because the mechanism is broken. He has it fixed and it rings during the celebration. So I do love Valentine’s Day.
We really don’t tend to celebrate it in our marriage other than telling each other Happy Valentine’s Day! Very occasionally (once a decade?) we may do something more. If our marriage depended on celebrating everything “properly” I guess we’d be divorced by now. But we’re not!
I wrote a Valentine’s Day banquet into Secretly Yours, a novella that released a year ago. It was fun to write a Valentine’s Day themed story.
I agree with you. Valentine’s Day is so commercial. For singles, it can be a really depressing day!! It shouldn’t be about having to celebrate love on one particular day!!
As a pastor’s wife of a German American church in the 1980s in Chicago, one year I had a special Valentine dinner for six WW 2 German couples. Dessert was a heart shaped cake. For a favor, I made cloth heart shaped frames and took each couples picture with a Poloroid camera. My boys (ages 7 & 3) dressed in black pants, white shirts, and red bow ties with a red dish towel on their arms served the dinner plates. These couples where always kind to our family, especially our boys and this is the way we returned their random acts of kindness. It was a fun evening for all.
We don’t do anything special for Valentine’s Day, usually. Though I do like to tease my hubby with his mid-November birthday that he’s a Valentine’s day celebration. It makes him squirm :)
Jill, I thought it was pretty funny too! I think she did that every year! :)
Renate, it sounds like your weather yesterday was fantastic! Sounds like lots of fun!
Melissa, that sounds like a fun tradition to give something to your family. Congratulations on almost 37 years! The chocolate chip cookies sound delicious!
Happy (late) Anniversary! Sounds like you had a good one! (and a new washer and dryer is a great gift…I could use an upgrade on those myself!)
This is our 3rd Valentine’s Day together…the first two we didn’t do anything! So going out to dinner was the first time we’ve actually celebrated Valentine’s Day, although more than anything we wanted to eat at our favorite place. :) I’ll have to check out Secretly Yours–sounds good!
Linda, I totally understand that!
Oh, that’s funny! I’ll bet it does! :)
I like to make Valentine’s Day special for my family. Since hubby and I have been married almost 43 years we like to get each other a little something but our emphasis is more on making it a special day for our two grandchildren.
In years past my hubby liked to have flowers delivered to me at home on Valentine’s Day. That lost its special meaning since you never knew when they were going to be delivered. I had to be home all day waiting for the “special” delivery. One year it was after 5 PM and the flowers hadn’t been delivered when my hubby got home from work. He called the florist and was told they were behind in getting the deliveries out. He went to the florist and picked them up and delivered them himself. That was the last year he went with flowers being delivered.
So glad that back in my high school days in the late 60’s there wasn’t much of an emphasis on Valentine’s Day. There were no fund raisers or flower deliveries. Valentine’s Day was always fun in elementary school since it was all inclusive.
I am like you .It was never a favorite holidays because I was shy and didn’t get many Valentine’s gifts except for my dad always got me a small box of chocolate each year
Well, I don’t love Valentines day but I don’t hate it either! To me, my spouse and I should be celebrating our love in the everyday ordinary things. Not that we don’t do anything romantic on V-day, but it’s usually more muted…a nice dinner, exchanging of cards and a good chat over our dinner. I think an even more special day for us is our anniversary in April. That’s when we like to plan a trip somewhere and stay for a day or two. Just spending time alone is so nice & connects us in ways that we can’t get any other time. Taking time away from everyday life is more special to us, making those precious memories :-)
I’m not a big fan of Valentine’s Day. I renember in High School being one of those who wanted a rose given to me so bad, but it never happened. I always thought that Valentibe’s day was so silly. We should show love to each other everyday. My heart hurts for those who have to watch co workers showered with gifts on that day, while they cry inside with loneliness. And for the ones at school who feel left out, I wish I could send each of them a flower to say God loves them.
It’s so funny I’m the opposite, I actually don’t take it seriously the only fun thing I get out of it is the flowers, chocolate, fun features romance authors do (i.e materialistic things).
I’ve never been wild about Valentines Day but my husband bought me a book of my choice this year so I could definitely get used to that!