I write Christian romance, and I love what I do.
Every now and then, though, I get a little tired of the same-ol’-same-ol’.
It’s not that I get tired of Christian fiction, but let’s face it. Romances have happy endings, and sometimes in life, we just don’t get the same. Every now and then I want the fiction I read to be a little more representative of real life.
If I want my reading material to be like that, why not what I write?
I’m not in love with horror as a genre, but I figure it’s a good place to dip my toe in the pool. I’d be way out of my depth in sci-fi or paranormal, and don’t get me started on fantasy. I don’t know the difference between an elf and an orc, let alone an orc and an ogre or an ogre and a goblin. Unicorns. I know what a unicorn is. It’s hard to write an entire fantasy novel with nothing but unicorns, though. Not that I’ve tried. It just seems like it would be a challenge. Or at least one-dimensional. (Even if it would be a pointy dimension.)
So back to horror.
I thought I’d try my hand at it. See what you think.
***
The sun rose on the horizon and forced its way through her window, scorching her eyelids until she rolled over and buried her face in the cool cotton of her pillow.
“Ugh. Morning.”
With little thought for the dark shapes that had haunted her dreams the night before, Liza rose from her bed and dragged her way into the bathroom. The sight in the mirror was anything but pleasant. She had two job interviews ahead of her, and she looked like the walking dead. True, her flesh wasn’t rotting off, but the circles under eyes were dark enough to give any zombie a run for their money.
A lengthy conversation with her toothbrush – nobody wants to bring morning breath with them to an interview – followed by a hot shower and a fresh set of clothes almost brought Liza into the land of the living. She only needed one more thing to make her morning complete.
Liza crept down the stairs, hop-scotched through the dining room to avoid the series of creaky floorboards, and made her way into the kitchen. A furtive look to the right and left assured her she’d not yet been discovered. Ravenous beasts lurked about waiting to steal her food, so she usually waited until she left the house to eat. There was one thing, though… one thing she simply couldn’t face the world without. She had to have it. The life of everyone she came into contact with depended on her morning inoculation.
Liza opened the cupboard, pulled the medicinal mix down and removed the tightly sealed lid that guarded it from spillage.
No.
Oh no.
Empty?
No.
It couldn’t be.
People’s lives depended on this. If she didn’t get her…
“Yo, Liza.” The voice slithered across the room.
Heart racing at triple time, she turned toward the intruder. One of the ravenous beasts had woken and now looked at her with hungry eyes.
“W-what do you want?”
“Breakfast.” Drool pooled at the corner of his mouth.
Avoiding eye contact, she flicked her hand toward the fridge. “I’m sure there’s something in there.”
She risked a peek.
His eyes flick toward the fridge and then back to her. He licked his lips. “I suppose.”
On shaking legs, she inched away from the counter and toward the door. What was she going to do? Until she got a job, she was broke. She needed her morning shot, and she didn’t have money to replace what had gone missing. No one would be safe around her, and she would end up blowing both interviews. This was bad. Very, very bad.
Her hand was on the nob when she heard movement behind her. A furtive look told her it was too late. The beast was upon her. Only, he wasn’t trying to force her back into the kitchen, a slave to his constant demands for more food. He was waving something in her face. What was that…?
“Here Sis. You’re useless without your morning shot of caffeine, and I emptied the coffee can last night. Here’s a ten. Get yourself some fancy coffee drink on the way to your interview. Just don’t spill it on yourself. Nobody’ll hire you if you look like a slob.”
Liza grabbed the bill and bolted out the door. Order was once again restored. She would have her coffee, and the rest of the world would be safe.
***
Hm. Apparently even in horror I have the compulsion to write a happy ending. Go figure. (Let’s face it. I’d never punish a character by making them go permanently without coffee. I’m not capable of that much cruelty.)
Happy April Fool’s Day!
So what’s the biggest April Fool’s prank you’ve ever pulled? I have friends who always come up with fantastic and elaborate jokes. I usually consider it a success if I make it through the whole day without publicly embarrassing myself. (Of course, that’s kind of my definition of success any day of the year…) ;)
And now I’m off to go do what I love…write more Christian romance! ;)
Heather Gray loves coffee, God, her family, and laughter – not necessarily in that order! She writes approachable characters who, through the highs and lows of life, find a way to love God, embrace each day, and laugh out loud right along with her. And, yeah, her books almost always have someone who's a coffee addict. Some things just can't be helped. Despite their different lives and situations, Heather’s characters have something in common. They're all flawed...but loved anyway.
I loved this, Heather! “I’d never punish a character by making them go permanently without coffee.” Ha ha!
Growing up, I always tried to trick my older sister on April Fools, but she always ended up getting me. Happy Friday!
This is great! Although, when I seen the title I thought to myself, isn’t this April Fools Day? But once I started reading, you had me for a second. Lol! :) Have a great weekend!
Haha! :) I’ll agree that no coffee is definitely a setup for horror.
Happy Friday to you, too, Jill!
I think it’s part of being a younger sibling…you have to TRY to trick the older sibling, but… I can remember being five and trying to pull one over on my nine-year-old brother. But I was five. My reasoning skills weren’t the best yet. I’m *pretty sure* I was completely transparent. Nice guy that he was, though, he at least tried to humor me. ^_^
I hope you have a marvelous April!
Thanks for stoppin by Rachelle! I tried to think of what I could write that hadn’t already been done for April Fools’ Day…but everything I came up with either involved personal hygiene or writing. On the off chance that somebody might have believed me if I posted about the benefits of only showering monthly, I decided to go with a writing theme… ^_^
Right!? I’m pretty sure that if I had to fight off a hoard of zombies, and all I had were my cup of coffee and a cotton ball, I’d be throwing that cotton ball at them… ^_^
Awesome. That is the only kind of horror I want to read! I’m a chicken about April Fools. Growing up I did it with my mom and sister (I think it had worn off by the time Daddy got home from work) but we always did super silly things and none of us were creative about pranks. Now though, I am scared to do anything to my husband to remind him it’s April fools. He is MUCH more creative than I am and could get me good….I’m not sure it’s worth it and I don’t like to play games where I know I can’t compete. =)
Ha, thanks for the morning laugh–you are so creative!
One year a friend of mind fixed dinner for her family with April Fools’ in mind. She used jello pre-chilled in their glasses and told them it was fruit punch. She took pound cake and toasted it then put it together with orange frosting and told them it was grilled cheese sandwiches. Dessert was chocolate cupcakes with white icing…that were actually mini meatloaf cups with whipped mashed potatoes on top. I’d like to aspire to that kind of creativity, but I’m with you – I don’t want to start playing a game where the outcome is known before it even starts! ^_^
Thanks for stopping by, Lee! Have a fabulous April Fools’ Day! :)
I challenge you (ha!) to write a story — either romance OR horror, you pick — with no characters who are not unicorns. You may put coffee, or the lack of it, into your story if you like. And post it here next month. Double dog dare ya!
Happy April Fools’ Day!
Oh dear. All unicorns, huh? I, uh…uh…hm…ah… *cough, cough* I think I might be coming down with something…it might be a unicorn allergy. ^_^
Thanks for making me laugh today. :-)
I had an uncle who loved to pull pranks…especially on April Fool’s. One thing I remember that was really funny was the time he moved the handles on his refrigerator/ freezer to the other side, and then had a bunch of people over and would have them go get him something out of it. People would pull and pull, but it wouldn’t open, and then he’d laugh so hard!! I cherish these funny memories now that he has passed from this life. They bring a smile in the midst of the sadness of not having him here with us.
Anytime! ^_^
Memories are a beautiful and precious thing. Sometimes we learn from them, and sometimes we find solace in them. I’m so glad you have some laughter-filled memories of your uncle. He sounds like quite the man! (Anybody who would go through that much effort for a good wholesome laugh is golden in my book!)
Loved that! :) We’re pretty big on our coffee around here, too! In fact, we run a coffee shop. We get our coffee from a local coffee roaster and and my husband makes all the syrups we use to flavor the drinks. They’re delicious! He makes homemade ice cream, too, that he makes shakes with. Anyway, the only April Fool’s joke I have managed to semi pull off was in middle school when I told my friends that my dad had a relative he didn’t know about that had lived in England and that relative had died and left my dad his estate. I was shocked they seemed to believe me. In high school, my then boyfriend and I broke up right before April Fool’s, but there were a few people who didn’t believe us at first b/c they thought we were trying to fool them. That was a little awkward.
I loved the blog post but I don’t think I have her participated in the day.
HAHA Heather! I thought for sure that it would be a kid wanting breakfast NOT a brother…. :-D But he gets extra brownie points for coffee money!
And I honestly can’t remember an April Fool’s prank pulled on other people or being pulled on me. :-/
I make a homemade coffee ice cream that I’m partial to. Sometimes I’ll make it coffee/cinnamon, and that’s pretty good, too – but that’s as far as my ice cream making career has taken me. Of course, it helps that coffee ice cream is my favorite ice cream, so why would I ever try to make other flavors? ^_^ My son’s been trying to talk me into chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream because that’s his favorite. I’ll probably cave in eventually…but not yet. ;)
And yeah, the whole break-up thing sounds awkward. In a book, that would totally be a funny-awkward plot twist, but in real life it was probably heavy on the awkward and light on the funny. (I don’t know about you, but I’m really good at doing awkward in real life.)
But you and your husband run a coffee shop now, so really, nothing else matters. ^_^
I’m so glad you could stop by today Linda!!
Ha! A kid…I didn’t think of that. Maybe next time… ^_^
HA HA, Heather. That was really funny. I think you should stick with romance, though. Besides I really love your novels. Hope you had a fun April Fools Day.
I loved it! Amazing and so funny, too.
I have a romantic comedy coming out Spring 2017, and all I could think was, “Hm. I don’t think horrific comedy is a genre, so…” Besides, I have too much fun with romance to ever give it up. (Running out of coffee really is about all the horror I can handle!) ^_^ I hope you had a fantastic April Foll’s Day too!
So glad you could stop by Erin!