Do you like your hair? Do you fuss with it every morning? Do you wish you had a magic formula for perfect hair?
As an African-American woman, I’ve always fought with my hair. I recall long days of my mom trying to tame my kinky hair. I also remember, when I got older, that I started going to the beauty parlor. I had my hair permed so that it was shiny, straight and easier to manage.
When I read Deb Raney’s Above All Things, all of those memories of fighting with my hair, especially as a child, came rushing back to my mind. Above All Things is about Judd and Evette, a happily-married Caucasian couple who is expecting their first child. When it’s discovered that Judd has as a bi-racial young daughter, their world changes drastically. Judd didn’t realize he’d fathered a child and now his help is needed to raise his daughter, Jolie.
I really loved the book! The characters were so vivid and so REAL. I could just imagine them so well in my mind. I also LOVED how Deborah showed how hard it was for Evette to care for Jolie. She didn’t realize that there were certain things that needed to be done care for Jolie’s African-American hair. Just washing poor Jolie’s hair was a battle for both of them. I felt the hair battle was symbolic of the fight going on for both characters. Both were going through great stresses in their lives and they were doing the best they could to deal with their pains.
Overall, this was a great, satisfying and emotional Christian read!
This is the blurb for Above All Things:
They were on their way to being a real family…until she came into their lives.
Expecting their first baby, Judd and Evette McGlin are thrilled at the prospect of becoming parents. But their marriage faces the ultimate test when Judd learns he already has a child: a six-year-old bi-racial daughter, born amid secrets and lies. Now, Evette must decide if she can accept the child—and forgive Judd. She thought she was open-minded—until hidden prejudices threaten the future of an innocent little girl, Evette’s marriage, and the very notion of the woman she’s believed herself to be. Above all things, this child needs acceptance and love. Needs Evette to discover what being a mother truly means. Needs Judd to face his past. And needs them both to discover what it truly means to be a family.
If you haven’t read this book, then you should!
So, do you like your hair? Do you ever wish you could change your hair in some way? Do you spend a lot of time styling your hair each morning?
I’d love to hear from you! Let’s talk about hair!
Cecelia Dowdy has been an avid reader since she learned to string letters together to form words. While pursuing a business degree in college one of her professors tried to convince her to get an English degree since he felt she was a great writer. Years later, after receiving her BS in Finance, she took her former teacher's advice, and started pursuing her literary career. She loves to read, write, and bake delicious desserts during her spare time. She also loves visiting new places and listening to old tunes with her husband. Currently she resides with her spouse and pre-teen son in Maryland.
I have very thin and fine hair. I have always wanted long hair but that never happed cos it is just to thin and fine and grows slow. Now due to some medications I have been on its even thinner (and the fact I have a few scalp issues). One advantage is it dries very quickly. currently its driving me mad as some is now regrowing and I have different lengths which cause issues. I know another friend who had curly hair and she hated it she wanted it straight. I think we often dislike what we have. I do like that I had blonde hair it was just I wanted it longer and thicker.
Hi Cecelia. What a fun topic to talk about:) I have good friends who are Fijian and their hair is beautiful, then some of my students who are Sudanese, Indian, Vietnamese…all with gorgeous hair yet each is different. My hair is…fluffy! It is long, curly and needs product to make it stay where it should! Most mornings it gets placed in a pony tail, or clipped back with a barrette or jaw clips to keep it out of my face. I smile (and am thankful!!) that God gave me two boys- getting them to brush their hair can be a challenge…how different from girls!
Blessings:)
I don’t do anything to my hair besides wash and air dry. I sometimes wish I had curls, so in the summer I spray with salt water and scruncit for beachy waves.
Hi Cecelia! Interesting topic. My hair is fine, straight with very little body, but I have lots of it; therefore I have always had short hair. Tried to grow my hair to my shoulders in college, but gave up. To give my hair body also would get body waves several times a year. Only my hairdresser knows my true color and she gives me a good hair cut once a month, so I do not need to spend much time looking presentable. Being retired a good wash, a little gel, blow dry and a curling iron is the morning routine. While working full time as a high school teacher, I spent more time on my hair and make up.
My hair is normally straight and the only problem is that it lacks the body it used to have. But our granddaughter’s hair is kinky. Her mother or father spends about 45 minutes spraying detangler & finger-combing it small strand by small strand. We have been amazed at how quietly & patiently she sits through it. Then it has to be done again after nap, before bedtime, and after playing hard. But she has the most beautiful curls!!
Hi Cecilia, what a fun post and topic. I straighten my curly, frizzy hair most days. Today’s straightening irons are a big improvement over the iron (actual CLOTHES iron) I used when I was a teenager. College was the first time I had close girlfriends who were African American, and I remember watching them use hot combs and some kind of hair wax. They laughed when I asked if I could try it… maybe it would have worked!
Sometimes I think I should just get a wig and be done with it. I’m not one of those women who knows how to style hair. At 57, I’ve come to the conclusion that I never will be. My hair has a touch of wave to it, which would be fine if it were consistent with it. But no, it flips this way here, that way there, and straight as a stick over there! It lays beautifully for my stylist though!!!
My hair never fully returned after cancer treatment and chemotherapy in 2005. Now instead of the long full flowing hair I once had, I have very short gray hair. That’s okay. My husband loves it!! :-) I love being able to get ready quickly in the morning. :-)
I have a lot of hair but it is super fine and lifeless. I’ve always wanted curly hair. ?
I didn’t like my hair much as a kid – it would frizz when it got wet. I remember getting together with a girlfriend once around college age, and discovering we each envied the other’s hair! Then I went to a seminar and learned to accept the way God made me, including my hair. Not too long after that, I got married and went to live with my Air Force husband in Taiwan. My frizzy hair really went wild in the hot, humid weather. I finally went to the Base Exchange and asked for a short, easy to care for haircut. The stylist layered it, and I discovered I have naturally wavy hair. As long as I comb it out as it dries, it develops lovely waves and I don’t have to set it! Unfortunately, my hair is the only part of my body that likes hot, humid weather :-)
Hi Cecelia, Thanks for sharing ‘Above All Things’ with us. I haven’t read the book and the premise sounds fascinating. My hair has a mind of its own and frizzes in humid weather. You’ve reminded me that I need to make a hairdresser appointment before Christmas. :)
Deborah Raney’s book looks good. I like short hair.
Hi, Jenny. I think you are correct. We often dislike what we have. I’ve received several compliments over the years about my hair, but, I rarely think positive thoughts about my locks. My hair is time consuming, that’s what it is! I lost some of my hair when I was on a high blood pressure medication. I had to ask my doctor to change it. I did Google it and found that hair loss/breakage was a side effect for some. I freaked out. My hair is so thick that others didn’t notice, but, I did, right around the edges of my scalp, above my forehead, it was noticeable to me. The hair dresser was concerned too. I no longer take that medication. It was ruining my life! Yes, I’m being a bit dramatic, but, I started to appreciate my hair when that happened!
Wemble!! Oh my! Exactly! When I was pregnant with my now 12-year-old son, I prayed HARD to have a boy. First reason was genetics (too long of a story to get into here). Second reason was the HAIR! I didn’t want to bother with a little girl’s hair. Do you know how much time it took my mom to wash, braid, unbraid, blow dry and them straighten my hair? Practically the entire weekend! My scalp would be SO SORE when she was finished plus she sometimes accidentally burned my scalp with that straightening comb! ugh!
Sounds like the Sudanese, Indian and Vietnamese students’ hair is pretty. The folks I’ve known from those nationalities have straight, dark and sometimes shiny, pretty hair! What a treat! :-)
Hi, Alyssa! the salt water scruncit style sounds cute and fun! Have a great day! :-)
Renate! Hi! My pics show my true hair color. I’ve never gotten my hair colored in my entire life. I do have some gray sprouting in the front, so, if it gets to be a lot, I might get it colored! I currently spend more time on my hair than my makeup. Actually, I rarely wear makeup. I usually wear it when I’m getting my pic taken. Sounds like you’ve got a nice routine for your locks! Have a great day!
Becky! It is simply an amazing blessing that she sits through all of that! Sounds like she has some pretty hair!
Hey, Lee!! People actually used a CLOTHES iron on their HAIR??? Really??? I didn’t know that! See my comment to Wemble if you wish! I talk about my mom straightening my hair with that straightening comb! Hated it! took too long but the results were nice! I have a relaxer in my hair now. Started going to hairdresser and getting that put in in my teens. My first hairdresser was a man named Hosea. He gave me my first perm and I was only 13 or 14 years old! :-)
Sherri, I’m with you on styling! I have to go to hairdresser every two weeks to get my hair done. You know what? I go to this Dominican place – they’re African-descent and they speak Spanish. I only go once in a while because their dryers are SO HOT, but my hair looks SO NICE when they do it. Do you know how many compliments I get when I go to Dominicans? It’s just so painful and hot to get those good results. Sometimes it’s just not worth it for me…sometimes it is…which is why I only go occasionally.
I’ve often thought of chopping all my hair off and having a short, boy-like cut. But, I just can’t do it! In spite of all my complaining, I’d be a basket case without my hair. It’s a big part of me!
Minion, getting ready quickly is wonderful! Short hair is great! I’d be a basket case if I lost my hair, but, I suppose I’d have gotten a wig. That would’ve been hard for me!
Hi, Lucy. Yes, we usually want what we don’t have.
Hi, Margaret! Your hairstyle given to you by your stylist sounds like a dream come true! How wonderful!
Hi, Narelle! There seem to be others commenting about a similar problem with hot humid weather on their hair! Don’t forget to make your appointment! Actually, my next appointment is this coming Saturday. I go every 2 weeks because my hair needs lots of HELP, because it is thick and unruly! LOL!
Hi, Andrea! I used to wear my hair longer but, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve been getting it cut more frequently. I find that shorter hair looks better on a more “mature” woman like me! LOL! Yes, be sure to check out Deb’s book! I’m pretty sure you’ll find it to be an enjoyable read!!! :-)
Cecelia, I LOVE your review of Above All Things, and I am smiling big at this hair conversation! I think Jenny said it all: Whatever we have, we want the opposite. One of my sisters has super curly hair that she fights every step of the way. I would trade my thin, fine, stick-straight hair for hers in a New York minute! I’ve been growing my hair out for almost 2 years now and I’ve decided my little-old-lady hairdo will be a bun. So much easier than trying to get some shape into my hair whether long or short. I also wish I had blue eyes (although I tried on blue contacts once and discovered I do NOT look good with blue eyes! Hmmm…maybe God knows best??) Thank you so much for the encouraging words about Above All Things. I’m thrilled to know you enjoyed it.
I have straight black hair that’s hard to style so I leave it down. And straight. Not sure if I love my hair but not committed time-wise or money-wise to change it.
Cecelia, the review is nice and the book sounds good. I went natural a few years ago and I have to say I hate my hair. I’m more of a fix it in .10 minute kind of girl, but it takes almost an hour to twist or set it into a style. And, I’m not the wig, or braids type of girl. But, I’m making the best of my nautral curly mess. One day I’ll go back to a very short quick style.
cos I have such fine and thin hair when it started falling out it was noticeable and I now have a patch it won’t grow back. I have a couple of patches of non scarring alopecia. A couple of the drugs I was on made some fall out and then when I changed to what I am on now it got worse but has settled. In the end I would have lost about a third of my hair and had to have it cut shorter as it was too noticeable. Having it shorter has made it better as it was growing back in most places. Its still thinner but it has thickened up at the back of my hair. On the plus side my hair is dry in 10 mins or less. easy to handle.
Hi, Deb! I’m laughing about the bun and the contacts. I think my old lady hair do will be short and a bit curly. But, a bun does sound enticing since you can pull it back and it’s basically a no-fuss style! I’ve had acquaintances who’ve had colored contacts, but, I’ve never tried them. I guess I’m too busy fussing with this hair to put any thought to changing my eye color! LOL!
SBM, Your hair sounds simple, no-fuss and easy! You are blessed! :-)
Hey, Bridget! An entire hour??? Oh my! I usually fuss with my hair for about five minutes (maybe a bit longer at times). No, it does not look perfect, but, I get it so that it looks presentable but not gorgeous. You know what? I’m too busy to style my hair in the morning. I stick a baseball cap/winter hat/straw hat (depending on the season) before I leave home. I drop off my son at school and drop off hubby at work. When I get to work, I go into the ladies locker room (there’s a gym at my job), I open my locker and pull out my comb, brush, large hand mirror (gotta make sure my hair’s not sticking up in the back. Folks have told me that my hair’s sticking up in the back so I gotta make sure it looks halfway decent all the way around) and my hair spray (gotta make sure it’s sleek and shiny-looking). If I have a Dominican style, it’s so straight that it looks perfect w/o doing anything. If I have a curly style, it takes longer to style – but, not too long, since I have to get upstairs to my desk! Whew! What a mouthful! My advice to you is, go back to a very short quick style soon – our lives are too short to over-fuss with our hair! LOL!
I have fairly thick hair that’s sort of wavy/curly and I’ve really begun to embrace it over the last couple of years. For a number of years I had really short hair because I don’t like to spend a lot of time messing with it when I get ready. I also have to agree that most of us want the hair we don’t have.
Hi, Jessica! I don’t like messing/fussing with my hair for a long time either! Yes, I think most folks want what we don’t have! Most women seem to not like their hair.