“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)
I believe that. Truly I do. But I have a confession to make.
*looks around to see who else is listening*
*whispers*
I am not a patient person. And I like getting my own way. Maybe too much.
Okay, if you know me, you know that means definitely way too much!
When God’s plans are different to mine, or when things take longer arriving than I hoped, I don’t always take it with the quiet and gentle acceptance I wish I could. I’m embarrassed to say, I’ve been known to throw tantrums with God like a two year old who dropped her ice cream cone in the sand.
People can plan what they want to do, but it is the Lord who guides their steps.
Proverbs 16:9 (ERV)
The problem is, to be human means to have hopes and dreams and expectations. No matter how much we trust in the Lord and seek His will in our lives, we can’t help it. We make plans. We hope God’s will lines up with ours.
Thankfully, it often works out that way. It’s easy to be grateful and give thanks to God when things go the way we hoped. But when what happens is different to what we planned? When what we get isn’t what we thought we signed up for?
For those Israelites God spoke to in Jeremiah 29, His plan was that they wait seventy more years in exile in Babylon. A long time, when false prophets were telling them they’d be home in two!
Some of you may have read the essay “Welcome to Holland”, by Emily Perl Kingsley. She compares special needs parenting to getting on a flight for a long-planned-for trip to Italy, and ending up in Holland instead. There’s nothing wrong with Holland, it’s just not Italy. We aren’t prepared for it. We don’t speak the language. Our guidebooks aren’t any help, because they’re for another country. It takes some getting used to how different it all is, and the experiences we have aren’t what we thought they’d be.
I certainly feel like I ended up in Holland sometimes.
A lot of the time.
I don’t know about special needs parenting, because all my pregnancies ended in miscarriage. I do know about being a special needs wife to my lovely husband, in ways I never expected when we first married. So many things have turned out nothing like I thought they would. It can be way too easy for me to think I somehow got on the wrong plane.
But the truth is, none of us knows the destination when we get on that plane, no matter where we think we’re going.
Getting on the plane labelled marriage, and making those vows, “For better for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health,” means going wherever the plane ends up. The same with the plane labelled pregnancy and parenthood, with all its built-in surprises and uncertainties.
No matter which plane we get on, the destination is always in God’s hands, not ours. His plan is always to prosper us, and give us a hope and a future. It just sometimes takes longer than we thought, and doesn’t look quite how we expected.
And that’s okay. Once we get used to being there, the surprise destination we never would have chosen can be even better than where we thought we were headed.
In my latest story, the heroine Catriona is a nurse with a special needs older brother. When one day at the Scottish seaside changes her life in unexpected ways, she discovers God’s plans for her are way better than her own!
More than Friends is available in the Splash boxed set, or as a separate ebook.
USA Today bestselling author Autumn Macarthur writes romances full of faith and hope, celebrating God's love as well as a man and a woman finding their happily ever after. She prays they’ll warm your heart and make you smile. An Australian transplanted to Britain, Autumn lives just north of London with her lovely English husband and three demanding cats, in a very small house with a teensy tiny garden. She loves talking to readers, so please get in touch! And get a free Christian romance novella when you sign up for her reader newsletter at http://bit.ly/Autumnsubscribe
Autumn, I literally wrote about about God’s timing not always matching mine last week for a blog that I will be on within the next month. I think he’s trying to tell us all something. :)
I with you, I’ve had a few tantrums, but I’m learning.
Thanks for the reminder of the verse from Isaiah. It’s one I’ve repeated to myself many times… also one my characters quote sometimes!
I love this posting, Autumn! Really good insight and honesty, too. I struggle often with waiting for God’s timing.
I understand what you are saying about finding yourself in a ‘country’ you never intended to visit, let alone live there! Your faith is an inspiration to me. I’m sure I would be too busy whining to even think about having faith in the same situation. May God bless you and your husband – you’re both in my prayers!
I think we all have a few tantrums, Kimberley (LOL, with me, MORE than a few!). Praying that your hopes and God’s plans align beautifully :)
It’s a good verse to keep in mind, isn’t it!
Thanks Lee! Yes, waiting can be hard, even when we totally trust that God keeps His promises.
Thanks for the prayers, Diane!
Um, I hate to tell you, but a fair bit of whining goes on here. In fact, my husband and I have been having some strongly worded discussions since I scheduled this post, so much so I even wondered if I should edit it!
Thankfully, God has carried us through another tough time, and I’m not quite ready to jump on the next flight to Italy, though the idea of packing my bags did occur to me! ;)
That verse from Isaiah has gotten me through quite a few hard times – though I wish I could say without tantrums, that would not be the truth. :) A lovely post and, for those of you who haven’t read Autumn’s novella (either in Splash or on its own), you really must – it’s an absolute delight.
Thanks Elizabeth.
And thank God for honest friends! It’s good to know I’m not the only one who kicks back a bit when God’s will isn’t what I hoped for. Round here, it’s more like the twist on that Footprints meme, where God saying “My beloved child, that’s where I carried you,” becomes “My beloved child, that’s where I dragged you, kicking and screaming!”
You need to put that last in a book, Autumn! Totally cracked me up because it describes too many times in my life!
It makes me giggle too! I didn’t make it up. Wish I had! If you Google, you’ll find a cartoon :)
I always love your posts, Autumn, and this one resonated with me in a number of ways. Beautiful sentiments. I had to smile at the reference to Italy and Holland, for one thing. Let’s just say Italy is my favorite European destination but my trip to Holland was okay but not quite the same great experience (but I never got on the wrong plane). And I have a special needs son named Matthew. Although he’s very high functioning, there are many considerations and challenges. Matthew has blessed us over and beyond and he teaches us so much about love, acceptance, and how to bloom where he’s planted. I’m going to share this post with others so they will be blessed, as I was!
Autumn, are you sure we’re not twins?? Ugh….I SO relate to you in so many levels!! But, like you, I’m learning to “go-with-the-flow” a bit more (not without a lot of whining, lol) & realize that God has it all under control. Maybe I was suppose to go to Holland instead of Italy, I just have to trust that God will work it all out. And yes, I’ve had plans go awry, and I’ve NOT handled it well at all. God still loves me through it all & in the meantime, I’m learning life lessons!
I’m so glad the post resonated with you, JoAnn.
Hugs and prayers for you and Matthew.
And yes, I’ve been to both Italy and Holland and loved both. We had lovely experiences in Holland we couldn’t have had in Italy, but Italy does have the edge. Still, I’m glad we went to Holland!
Oops, sorry Trixi! Looks like WordPress got confused, I definitely hit the reply under JoAnn’s post but it appeared beneath yours!
Maybe we are God twins, because whatever you comment here always strikes a true note with me :)
It’s wonderful to know that God still loves us, no matter how much we tantrum or whine, and yes, He has it under control. Even if a little part of me still wishes I had it under control instead!
I recently finished reading this in the SPLASH! collection and I so enjoyed it. Looking forward to reading other books by you. I have The Wedding List, Believe In Me, and A Model Bride on my summer reading shelf!
Thanks, I’m so glad you enjoyed More than Friends. Happy summer to you! :)
Lovely post, Autumn, and just what I needed to read today. Thanks for sharing with us :)
Thanks for reading and sharing, Narelle :)