As part of the promotion for the upcoming TV movie, Love Finds You in Charm (which premieres on the UP Network on June 7), the movie company, Guideposts, and I have been kicking around ideas about how I can help with the promotion.
Besides the obvious interviews, library talks and such, I’ve learned that Christian Mingle will be running ads for the movie. I guess someone there learned that I got married fairly recently and a little later in life than most people. One of the ideas they had was for me to possibly do some dating advice type things in conjunction with those ads.
Which made me laugh a little bit. Who am I to give dating and love advice?
Hey…wait a minute! Not only am I a romance writer, but I also spent more than half my life dating. (Seriously. My first date was at 16. I got married at 37. That’s a lot of dating years!)
So I got to thinking about what that advice might be. And I don’t know if there are any single ladies who may read this blog…but just in case, here you go!
- Be patient. Patience is a lost art. I think in the dating and love arena, it’s key. You may have some kind of “calendar” that tells you that you must check off certain life milestones by certain ages. Ignore those. Trust God.
- If you’ve always dated a certain “type” and yet you are still looking. . .maybe it’s time to go out with a different “type” of guy. On one of our first dates, my now-husband asked me if he was my type. I answered honestly. No. He wasn’t the kind of guy I typically went out with. But our dynamic worked and I couldn’t be happier. Be open-minded.
- Be yourself. Don’t be afraid someone isn’t going to like you just as you are. If they don’t appreciate you for who you are, then they aren’t the person you’re going to want to spend your life with.
- It’s wonderful to have high standards—just make sure they aren’t impossible to meet. No one is perfect. Even Prince Charming has flaws.
- Communication is so important. No one can read your mind.
Those are a few of my tips! I hope they can help someone who is looking for love.
Be sure and tune in to the UP Network on June 7 for the premiere of Love Finds You in Charm!
Trixi O. says
Though I’m not single now, I used to be (of course)! I couldn’t “officially” date until I was 16, which was really fine with me since I really didn’t have a boyfriend at the time. I had a high school sweetheart, it was kind of an on again off again thing, so I wasn’t too serious about a relationship at that young age. I just wanted to get through with school…lol!!
I’ve been through a lot of romances in my growing up years….mostly bad ones so I wasn’t looking to have anyone. I was also a new Christian as a young lady (20yr old give or take), so I just wanted to be happy serving Him. There is a longer story to this, but suffice it to say, God gave me a husband when I wasn’t looking or wanting one! I had given up on having anyone good in my life & that was okay with me. I’m so glad God had other plans for my life :-) We’ve been married almost 18yrs (April 5th), have two kids (23 & almost 18) and a 1 yr old grandbaby. And I can’t imagine my life being any happier!
You gave great advice to single women here in your post today! I wished I had someone to tell me what you did here to my younger self. I thought so much of my identity was in a man, when essentially it’s in Christ. And dating someone not your “type”, well I can say (like you) my husband certainly wasn’t my type….God knew what He doing in His perfect plan for us as a couple! My husband is the personification of 1 Corinthians 13, and I couldn’t be more blessed! He’s my love, my best friend, my everything I didn’t know I needed in my life!
Valerie Comer says
Thanks for sharing your story, Trixi! God is faithful.
Andrea Cox says
Annalisa, thanks for rising to the challenge of giving dating advice. Great tips! I am single and haven’t ever really dated. Oh, and I’m 27. And waiting on God’s timing. I’m really more interested in a courtship relationship than a dating one, but I’m remaining open-minded to whatever God has in store for me. As for now, though, I’m working on gaining (or increasing) patience, contentment, and many other characteristics that will honor God and my future husband. If I “master” them now, then perhaps they’ll come a bit easier once I’m married and reach the challenges that change in life will bring on.