Sometimes love whispers. It grows slowly, sweetly, over many months and years.
Other times, love shouts! It can happen in an hour, a day, a week.
I believe it can be just as real, just as true, no matter how it happens.
In many of my books, my characters fall in love fast! From first meeting to acknowledging a love that will lead to marriage can take no more than a few weeks. One of my stories actually happens all in one day (though that couple had known each other all their lives).
My latest book, Teapots & Tiaras, releasing in the Whispers of Love boxed set this summer, is another story where despite a number of obstacles and differences to overcome, things happen quickly. Anita goes from initial dislike to “Oh no, I’m starting to fall in love with him” in a week, just four meetings!
Too fast to be realistic? I don’t know. I do believe it’s possible to fall in love and commit to a person quickly, but maybe that’s because I did!
Love flares up like a blazing fire, a very ardent flame.
No amount of water can quench love;
a raging flood cannot drown it out.
Song of Songs 8:6-7 (Voice)
The fastest love story I ever heard was from a friend’s boyfriend. He told me how his parents had met just once, the night before his father was due to ship out. The next day his mother impulsively dumped everything in her life to follow his father, who was in the Navy, half-way around the world to be there to meet him at his next port. They married straight away, and three grown-up kids and thirty years later were still very happy together. Now put that in a story and try to make it believable!
I didn’t quite fall in love that fast. My husband and I would never have met normally, our paths didn’t cross in any way. But I was unexpectedly sent to a different hospital for a single day, and given the task of working beside him, in preparation for a training session I’d be presenting. He seemed so totally not my type. He said a few things suggesting opinions I completely disagreed with. Reason and logic told me I should dislike him.
But for some reason, I didn’t.
Far from it.
We spent all our lunch break talking. After our shift finished, we stood outside talking for hours. When it got dark, we reluctantly agreed we should leave, but exchanged phone numbers.
Three weeks later, we’d spoken on the phone, sent each other texts, and met several times, talking for ages over coffee or walks around town. We still hadn’t had a proper date. We hadn’t kissed. Yet I knew what I’d never felt for anyone else before. I loved him, and felt sure this was the man God intended me to spend the rest of my life with. Only a month later, we were engaged and planning our wedding.
Our marriage hasn’t been a fairy-tale happy-ever-after by any means. We’ve faced illness, job loss, emotional upheaval, financial challenges. We’ve done the whole “for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health” thing. But we’ve committed to the “to love and to cherish, till death us do part” bit as well. Despite the difficulties, I still know for sure this is the man God wants me loving and learning with for as long as we both shall live!
I’m learning to work at staying in love. I’m learning patience. I’m learning to love with a stubbornness and determination that isn’t based on how I feel but on what I’ve committed to. I’m learning to lean on God and trust in His strength when I can’t trust my own.
Whether it happens slow or fast, whether it whispers or shouts, I wonder if that’s what we really mean when we say we’ve fallen in love? We recognise, in our truest hearts, God working in our lives through that other person. We recognise that this is the person who can teach us the life lessons God wants us to learn. We recognise that with this person, our heart can open deeper and wider and more completely than it ever can with anyone else. We decide to commit to keeping on loving this person, allowing the fast burning flame to grow over time into something unquenchable.
Hopefully, the other person makes that same commitment.
I believe that’s how it can be. That’s the sort of love I want to live. That’s the sort of love I want to write about.
Love that’s not necessarily easy, but love that lasts.
I’d love for you to share your thoughts on whether we can fall in love too fast, maybe even your own true love story? All comments made on this post by June 8th will go in a prize draw and one will be chosen at random to win the ebook of the winner’s choice from my published books (excluding multi-author boxed sets).
If you’d like to read Teapots & Tiaras, you can get it, along with 11 other lovely new-release contemporary Christian romances, in the Whispers of Love set, at the special preorder price of 99c.
USA Today bestselling author Autumn Macarthur writes romances full of faith and hope, celebrating God's love as well as a man and a woman finding their happily ever after. She prays they’ll warm your heart and make you smile. An Australian transplanted to Britain, Autumn lives just north of London with her lovely English husband and three demanding cats, in a very small house with a teensy tiny garden. She loves talking to readers, so please get in touch! And get a free Christian romance novella when you sign up for her reader newsletter at http://bit.ly/Autumnsubscribe
Well said. That commitment is what keeps my husband and I together. We love each other but sometimes those feelings get lost in the everyday hassles of life and in those times if we are not making it a daily choice to love each other, who knows where we would be today. We have been married 36 years. He’s the best.
What a lovely post, especially reading your love story. Commitment is totally the key- a promise made to remember, as you said, in the good and bad times. Love for me came in whispers- I noticed him right away, but love grew over time and through shared adventures. We have only been married 14 years, but, like every couple, face challenges that force us to remember our vows and commitment- I cannot imagine being on this journey of life, marriage and parenthood with anyone else. The blog posts this week have been especially great, thanks for your contribution to thoughts on love and its beginnings.
The parents of your friend’s boyfriend did have a whirlwind romance…wow! I think as long as person isn’t expecting the other person to fill some kind of void, love can happen fast. I’ve always been a believer that we must be happy and love ourselves first before we can receive love from another. I can’t wait to read Teapots & Tiaras, Autumn!
Well written post in today’s world, which can take the concept of falling in love lightly. We fall in love with food, puppies, babies, and friends. It is the commitment to relationships that is important.
In my case love came softly. Next week my husband and I will be married 43 years. We have faced many challenges and with aging we will face many more. Our wedding scripture besides I Corinthians 13 – the great love chapter, was I John 4: 7 – 12: “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God…..This is love; not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.” Love is a choice.
That was very inspiring! Thank you!
My husband and I met and married in about 10 months, which is somewhat fast. I enjoyed your post about commitment, That’s what it takes for the long haul. We’ve been married almost 36 years and have had different trials along the way. God is faithful and helps our love grow while He provides for us!
I enjoyed the story of the whirlwind courtship!
My first and only real love happened and ended fast, within two weeks we declared our love, a week later he broke my heart. To this day I still love him though, we had remained in contact off and on for years until I finally could not take being just friends anymore, it hurt too much. So now I haven’t heard from him in six years. But regardless of how it all turned out, he unlike every other guy I have dated even the one I was briefly married to and the two others I had become engaged too…well he I still love where as I feel little in regards to the others. So at least I can say I knew how to kove someone, he just didn’t love me back the same way.
It is possible to fall in love too fast but it is not a bad thing. At least you know what love should feel like or supposedly feel like.
Love your posts about your marriage, Autumn! I think love can happen quickly or slowly, as you say. One thing we have to watch out for is mistaking physical attraction (which can be instant) for love. I work really hard to clarify that distinction in my books and I think that difference is one of the great things about Christian romances.
Judy, it lifts me heart to read that! To be able to say “He’s the best” after 36 years together is a precious thing, That daily choice is so exactly what I believe commitment is. It’s not easy, but it’s necessary.
I would love to hear more of your love story too! So true, the challenges deepen our commitment by forcing us to renew those vows. You expressed it beautifully!
That one did make me blink too, Jill! But they were honestly among the happiest couples I’ve known.
You are so right though, it takes wisdom we don’t always have when we’re caught up in intense emotion to recognise if this is truly the person God means us to lean our life lessons with, or if we’re clutching at them hoping to fill that inner void only going deeper with God can really fill.
LOL, that’s such an important topic it’s a whole other blog post!
I forgot to reply to something else important you said there- being happy in ourselves and loving ourselves first.
Soooooo essential! Jesus said we need to love others as we love ourselves, so extending the same grace God gives us to ourselves and seeing ourselves through merciful and compassionate eyes is a precondition for being able to do the same for others.
Certainly in my case, that’s a lifelong project! I’m still learning how to truly forgive and let go.
So true, Renate. Praying you and your husband have many more blessed years together and that aging comes gently and softly as your love did.
I love those verses. That section from 1John one of my favourites, because the entire gospel and the greatest commandment is right there. Accepting God’s love is a choice, and loving others is a choice too.
Thanks for reading, Lesesne! Hope your day is blessed!
“God is faithful and helps our love grow while He provides for us!” That is so true, Diana!
I love hearing all the long marriages among the readers here. My husband and I started late, so we;ve only been married fourteen years!
Hugs, Cassandra! Praying you feel God’s grace working showing you how worthy of love He sees you. Also, that God brings a man worthy of your faithful heart into your life!
Hugs, Colleen. Sometimes the strong emotions of falling in love can mislead us, that is true. The emotion without the commitment being there on both sides can only end in heartbreak. :(
I do think his capacity for commitment was one of the things that most drew me to my husband. I’d previously thought I was in love with a man who was wonderful to be around, but unfaithful and unwilling to commit.
My next story will deal with a couple very like that, actually!
So true, Lee. It’s really easy to mistake that for love. Physical attraction feels good but can fizzle out fast. If it’s not backed up by mutual respect, shared values and a true commitment on both sides, it’s not going to work or last.
I grew in love with my husband long before he did me. He had been married before and was reluctant to jump in again. I eventually won him over though. I kept quoting the scripture from the Bible about two being better than one, LOL!
Thank you for sharing your love story! I find it so interesting how people meet and connect. I met my husband twice, both times by complete chance! Or was it?? ;) The first time neither of us were ready for each other. The second time, five years later, it was instant!
LOL, good use of Scripture, Gail! I’m so glad your persistence was blessed!
I do love hearing other people’s stories too! I’m so happy you and your lovely husband had a second chance! No such thing as coincidence, it had to be a God thing.
I look forward to reading that next story?
Thanks Colleen! It will be coming out in a Christmas Christian romance set, Candy Cane Kisses. Gotta get it written!
Love this whole post, but especially this:
We recognise, in our truest hearts, God working in our lives through that other person. We recognise that this is the person who can teach us the life lessons God wants us to learn. We recognise that with this person, our heart can open deeper and wider and more completely than it ever can with anyone else. We decide to commit to keeping on loving this person, allowing the fast burning flame to grow over time into something unquenchable.
I think falling in love can happen fast, slow, at medium pace, in many different ways. I think it depends on the people sometimes. But I think that what makes love last is the choice we make to follow through with the commitment we’ve made to that person and to God and choosing to let God continually work on us and love the other person through us even when our “feelings” might be change.
Such a sweet live story. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for reading, Priscila. <3
That is so true, Julie! Yes, it’s always about making that choice to follow through and to open our hearts and minds to God’s work in our lives, even when it doesn’t feel like what we want!
You know my story. Paul and I met online on the 22nd of February . We got engaged on the 14th of March and married on the 23rd of May . We have just celebrated our 2nd Anniversary. God brought us together and is a focal point in our marriage.
We are truly blessed.
Thank you for sharing your experience.
God Bless.
So sweet Lorraine! Prayers for you and Paul to share many happy and healthy years together :)