Next week, Hope for Love, book 3 of the Hope Ranch series will release. I thought it would be fun to bring Royal Hewitt along to say hello and tell us a little about what’s been going on with him.
So come on in and sit down, Royal, and say hello.
Royal: Hi, there. It’s nice to be here?
Elizabeth: Is that a question?
Royal: Maybe. I’m not sure why I’m interviewing on a romance blog.
Elizabeth: Ha. Well, you do quite a bit online, maybe we heard about you and thought you seemed interesting.
Royal: I guess that’s possible. I have a big social media presence, it’s been a fun way for me to make a living. Kind of the dream for my generation. Things have been a little tougher lately since I realized I needed to be a little more careful with what I was agreeing to.
Elizabeth: Oh? Why’s that?
Royal: It’s kind of a long story.
Elizabeth: We’ve got nothing but time. I mean, I have some questions, but I’m pretty sure we can work around to them. And this is interesting. Go on.
Royal: Yeah, all right. I guess it all started when I headed up to my grandparents’ ranch in New Mexico in the spring. My twin sister Skye was here and I needed her help with one of my sponsors. See, companies sometimes reach out and want me to use a product for them and then do a little promo. Anyway, this was one of those DNA kits and I thought, hey, why not?
Elizabeth: Those are interesting. Did you find out anything surprising?
Royal: You could say that. Not necessarily in a good way though — turns out we have a half-sister none of us knew about. But being here at Hope Ranch, being around my grandparents, seeing how Skye’s relationship with God has changed her? Well I decided I wanted that, too. And it’s great, don’t get me wrong. But I can’t just blindly accept some of the sponsors who come my way now, because I don’t think it’d be honoring to Jesus.
Elizabeth: Ah. That’s reasonable. And it’s hit your bottom line?
Royal: Sorta. I’ve got some ideas of what I can do to make up the difference. I’ll be okay. Especially since I’m going to stick around at Hope Ranch. Grandma and Grandpa are great–and as much as I try to insist on paying rent and carrying my weight, so far they haven’t been willing to take me up on it. They say it’s to make up for too many years when they didn’t do anything for me. But that’s not really their fault. I mean, my dad’s the one who walked away.
Elizabeth: Have you figured out why he did that?
Royal: Nope. I’m realizing that the stuff he told us was all lies. Grandma and Grandpa say they tried to keep in touch — but he closed them out. Now that I look back at my childhood, I wonder if we moved around so much in part to keep them from tracking us down. It’s sad.
Elizabeth: It’s all coming together now though? I mean, Betsy and Wayne went out to see your dad when he was sick in the spring, right?
Royal: They did. And he let them. But I don’t know. I guess we’ll see. I know Grandma says nothing’s impossible with God, but I look at my dad and think we’re going to need a miracle.
Elizabeth: God can do that. So, your brother, Cyan, found love at the ranch. And so did your twin. Any chance of that happening for you?
Royal: I mean, I can hope, right? There’s this girl, Sophie, who teaches kids to ride horses a few days a week. She checks all the boxes.
Elizabeth: That sounds promising.
Royal: You’d think that, wouldn’t you? She hates my guts.
Elizabeth: Ouch. Any idea why?
Royal: I guess she doesn’t believe people can change – even when Jesus gets a hold of them. I don’t know. For now, I’m not going to push. I just take a lot of opportunities to flirt with her and see if I can wear her down. In fact, I think it’s time for her to be here pretty soon – you mind if I bail?
Elizabeth: I guess not. We’ll see you around.
If you’d like to spend some time with Royal and Sophie and catch up with all the rest of the Hope Ranch crew, Hope for Love releases on July 14th but you can pre-order it today. (If you’re new to Hope Ranch, you can start at the beginning with Hope for Christmas for just $0.99.)
I had a beta reader (just one) suggest that Royal going out of his way to flirt with Sophie when she’d told him she wasn’t interested bordered on sexual harassment. None of my other betas or ARC readers has said anything, and this particular beta has a trauma history so is a little extra sensitive, but what do you think? Do you think characters in books should always walk away at the first no thanks? Why or why not?
One commenter by midnight Eastern US on Friday July 17th will receive an ebook copy of Hope for Love.
Elizabeth Maddrey is a semi-reformed computer geek and homeschooling mother of two who lives in the suburbs of Washington D.C. When she isn’t writing, Elizabeth is a voracious consumer of books. She loves to write about Christians who struggle through their lives, dealing with sin and receiving God’s grace on their way to their own romantic happily ever after.
Ooh that’s a tough question! I think it depends on the people involved, but ultimately no means no and if she tells him to stop flirting then I would expect a decent man to honour that request and stop.
Absolutely agree that no means no – it makes it super hard to have any sort of conflict in romance though if there’s no room for persistence or trying again.
It’s interesting though that I was raised in a family where teasing is the norm, but nowadays teasing like flirting is considered bullying/harassment depending on the context. I guess it means discovering other ways to create conflict :)
I guess there’s always the conflict of “why doesn’t he make a move? I thought he was into me.” 😂
I’m a survivor. Unfortunately, I don’t know when a guy is flirting. I do know when it’s harassment, but it’s gone pretty far by then. I’ve missed out on a number of potential relationships because I was clueless…because I didn’t understand healthy boundaries. It’s frustrating when people say that asking someone out once is harassment. I’ve read and heard a lot of accusations that said a great deal more about the accuser than the person being accused. Far too often, mind reading is expected and even demanded. Giving people grace has been kicked to the curb. When I was in my early learning stages, my boundaries were way out there, so it was sadly easy for anyone to violate those boundaries, without trying. It wasn’t about them harassing me; it was me feeling harassed. As I’ve become healthier, I’ve learned that people with healthy boundaries don’t violate boundaries. Once I understood this, I was able to observe people with healthy boundaries and adjust my own to healthier limits. Funnily enough, those who like to violate boundaries generally aren’t comfortable around those who have healthy boundaries and will go looking for those who don’t have them. I like realizing that I’m learning to be healthier. I’m so looking forward to reading this (going to download the first two). Woohoo!
Hugs! And THANK YOU for sharing your perspective. That’s so good to read and start to get a glimpse of understanding.
I love what you say about boundaries – I think it’s critical to realize that everyone has their own boundaries and we need to find and respect those (and be quick to apologize if we cross them unintentionally — and quick to forgive when someone apologizes honestly.)
In our modern political climate, this can be tricky. Everyone is so quick to call foul on someone else. Does real harassment exist? Absolutely. But it can also be fairly innocent and still be perceived as a personal affront.
I agree, it’s a tough line to draw in writing fiction, especially when the author needs to leave room for character growth. That means neither the hero and heroine can be perfect at the beginning. There are many ways humans are not quite perfect — probably seven billion ways, literally!
Indeed.
Coming at this from my point of view, flirting is fine, as long as there’s no physical overture of touching or a stance that could be taken as menacing. However, just because you’ve told someone you’re not interested, doesn’t mean you can’t still talk or joke with that person, as long as by tone of voice and what’s said is taken as joking. I do understand from your Beta’s experience why she would be saying what she did. There are many things today that are taken way too seriously compared to when I was younger. An example: a friend’s mother had Alzheimer’s. She accused her grandson of mistreating her, and the police were called. Her grandson was arrested and spent at least one day in jail til they couldn’t substantiate the claims and could talk to her doctor and find out it was all the Alzheimer’s, her grandson had done absolutely nothing, and he was released. You can’t joke that you’d hit someone, nothing. Everything is taken totally seriously now, and there’s no room for any joking around, which is a sad commentary on our lives. This are taken as harassment that never used to be. However, I could tell a guy I don’t want to go on a date with him, but that doesn’t mean we couldn’t say hi to each other or get to know each other, and I could change my mind. I was bullied as a child, and there’s a huge difference between bullying and joking, and getting along and harassment. If it was a kiss or more and she said no, then no definitely means no.
As the husband of a trauma survivor, I can testify that there are times when the boundaries seem to be set at ultra-conservative. But it is also true that trust can be built and kindness and consideration can be the order of the day. For reasons that I don’t fully understand, I tend to set my own boundaries conservatively as well. I’m sure I have missed out on relationships (healthy ones) by simply being unwilling to join in the fun. Writing about someone who has set difficult boundaries can be approached by using a search for other, more approachable boundaries. Doesn’t want to joke? Try being available as a servant. Not comfortable with touch? Try finding common interests or hobbies to either discuss or share, perhaps even discover unexpectedly. Unless the author truly intends to keep the two apart, I think there are other ways to bring them together without flirting.
I’m still enjoying the Peacock Hill series but I am looking forward to visiting Hope Ranch when I’m done!
This was kind of the tactic I took – she said no and he teased her a little. But he didn’t really push.
This is great insight!
It depends on perspective sometimes I think. Someone who has gone through sexual abuse at one time or another in their life might be more sensitive to flirting and thinking the other person means something they don’t. While someone who may never have experienced that in their life would be okay with a little flirting and not think anything sinister is going on inside the other persons head. I think someone who is flirting and knows the other persons history (or enough of it), can be sensitive to how and what they say or do to not make that person uncomfortable. If a person says no, I’d abide my time, respect boundaries and find ways to be friendly & helpful without making it seem over-the-top. A gentle spirit, kind words, and a healthy dose of respect for the other person can go a long way, in my opinion.
Sometimes no is just that…no. Other times it can mean, not right now but maybe with a little persuasion I’d consider wanting to get to know you more. I think prayer can help with discerning this & asking for God’s guidance in that situation. My opinion only, of course!
I think this is right on, Trixi :)
I agree, Trixi!! You explained it so well!!
Actually, reading some of the other comments, like Lincoln’s made me remember Dee Henderson’s book Unspoken. The female MC was tortured and abused, and the male MC meets her later on. He knows he wants to have a relationship with her, she’s been running scared for years, with only a few very close friends. He keeps pushing as much as she’ll let him in. He doesn’t do it brash or invasive, but gently, as much at a time as she’ll let him. That’s what I think of. And, really, isn’t that how God is with us? He doesn’t push Himself on us, but as we open up to Him, we get to know Him that bit more each time.
Love that – God definitely pursues gently but with determination.
If a person feel uncomfortable with someone, then yes of course it is more then o.k. to just walk away. Not worth it to find out to see what happens. Better be safe then sorry. I enjoyed reading this interview. Have a Great weekend and stay safe.
Thanks, Alicia – you too!
I think it depends on the lersona dn the situation. If someone just won’t leave you alone and makes you uncomfortable then that’s a time where it needs to stop. But if someone is just naturally flirty without pressuring you ro making you uncomfortable I think its ok to continue as long as it doesn’t cross the line.
Royal definitely falls into the naturally flirty category – he’s pretty harmless. Also possibly clueless.
It really depends on what the no is in reference to and how it’s said.
Definitely!
No , he or she should not walk away after the first no. There is always time to get to know a person. It makes a great story!