Part of a romance author’s writing process involves getting inside our characters heads and understanding how they think. One of the most important parts of this process is asking, “what is his/her lie?” A”lie” is the false belief they live with that shapes how the he or she reacts to situations and other characters. Overcoming this lie is a significant part of what drives the story.
In real life, we all have lies we live under, too.
No one will ever love me for me. I’m too much to handle. I’ve sinned to much. If they knew what I’d done, they’d never forgive me. My size/health/disability/appearance/shortcoming defines me. I’ve failed at everything else, there’s no point trying anymore. No matter what I do, I’ll never be good enough. So. Many. Lies.
I’ll admit, for many years my lie was I am either too much or not enough. Too much of the things no one wants (too loud, talkative, opinionated, descriptive, rough around the edges—take your pick) and not enough of the “right” things (not gentle enough, selfless enough, thin enough, worthy). My struggle to overcome this lie came to a head a few years ago, and it was during this season I funneled many of my feelings and frustrations into the character of Adaline Danvers, the heroine in More Than Enough (which I first wrote in 2019 for the Crossroads Collection When Snowflakes Never Cease).
While a significant majority of Ada’s story is hers alone, I have lived her need to project a perfect mom image while internally resenting expectations and feeling like a failure. I have walked in her shoes with the compulsion to help, to control, to find validation in doing things perfectly and then falling on my face until I had no choice but to submit to God.
When our lies become part of our identity, they become the filter or lens through which we perceive what others tells us and the catalyst for how we react in situations where that lie is thrown up in front of our faces. Every encounter that reinforces our lie increases its stronghold over us.
That’s a dangerous thing, especially for we who consider ourselves Christians.
We know the identity of the father of lies (John 8:44). He’s not our biggest fan. In fact, he seeks to steal, kill, and destroy, but Jesus came so we may have life to the full (John 10:10). In Christ, we have authority over the enemy and the power he wields in our lives (Luke 10:19).
Do you ever feel like you’re not enough?
The truth is, you aren’t. (I know. The truth hurts.)
But the good new for you, me, and my sweet heroine Adaline, is that GOD IS. Nothing we can do will ever be enough to make up for our shortcomings and failures. 2 Corinthians 12:9 reminds us He said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” We will never be good enough for God’s kingdom on our own. We will always be too much of one thing and not enough of another. But GOD is enough. JESUS is enough. His sacrifice for us ONE time on the cross is enough to cover a multitude of sins, failures, shortcomings, and flaws.
Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom (2 Corinthians 3:17)! And this includes freedom from the lies we’ve believed. It doesn’t matter what your lie is, God’s grace is enough to cover it. To break its power over you. And the beauty of the way God does things is it doesn’t require a whole lot. Jesus told the disciples that faith the size of a mustard seed can move mountains (Matt. 17:20)! What will it take to break the hold of the lies you’ve believed?
**Side note: I am not saying every malady will be made whole this side of heaven if only you believe hard enough. That would be unbiblical, and frankly, damaging. Some things require a lot more than simple faith to walk in freedom. There’s no shame in seeking therapy, medication, dietary changes, support from other believers, and other wise resources available to you. Jesus alone is the source of our freedom, but He can and will use a plethora of resources to carry out His work.**
I won’t spoil Ada’s pivotal scene in More Than Enough for you, but I hope if you choose to read it you will identify with her struggles and the way God brings her to her knees so she can finally accept that HE is enough. I also hope that if you’ve been struggling with inadequacies and feelings of not being enough—or any other lie that keeps you bound in captivity—that you will experience a similar breakthrough. I guarantee it won’t be easy, and it will probably hurt, but God promises He will never leave us nor forsake us. He will walk beside you each step of the way until you discover the freedom He so freely gives.
You are more than enough, my friend. Not because YOU are, but because HE is more than enough.
And because He loves you so very, very much.