I hosted an author takeover in our reader group on Facebook in November (you’re in our reader group, right? The Christian Romance Reader Gathering? If not, come join us, it’s a fun place to be!) One of the questions I asked was favorite setting for romance novels.
“Small Towns” was the overwhelming answer.
And it left me wondering, what’s so amazing about small towns?
It’s definitely a reader favorite — you just have to look at the bookshelves (or listings online) in romance (secular or Christian) to see it. The romance series that get made into Netflix series or movies? Small towns. Hallmark Christmas movies? Small towns.
It’s baffling to me.
I grew up in a small town.
One of my most distinct “small town” memories is from when I was eight or nine years old and my family decided to go to the movies. I don’t remember what we were there to see, honestly, but I do remember getting popcorn (major splurge!) and our seats and then, because Dad was a fanatic about being early so we didn’t miss anything, as we sat there for twenty(ish) minutes waiting for the movie to start, every. single. person. who walked down the aisle to find their seats stopped to say hello.
“Hey, it’s the Perrys!”
“Hi, Dennis. Linda. Girls. How are you?”
“Fancy running into you all here.”
And Mom and Dad looked at each other after the tenth or so greeting of that ilk and said, “You know it’s time to move when everyone who goes to the movies stops to say hi.”
And, in fact, we did move not too long after that (it’s not a causal relationship) – and settling in the DC area suburbs, where you were free to make your own small town out of people you wanted to know instead of the people who happen to be available? Life changing.
See, my family didn’t have a fantastic small town experience. My parents were (and are) outspoken believers in Jesus. And in the small town where we were, where science was god and any other worship was considered idolatry, you better believe that was unpopular. And in a small town, there’s nowhere to hide. There’s no way to get away.
And if the kids of the parents who hate your parents are cruel to you at school, there are no other options. There’s no transferring when there’s a single elementary school in town.
It wasn’t all bad. We had friends–good, lasting friendships that have stood the test of time and distance. But they’re few and far between.
Here are some of the reasons people gave for loving small town romances (and, hilariously, they’re the same reasons I struggle with them in real life):
“The whole town is like family.”
“The humorous busybodies who get involved in everyone’s business.”
“The heavy emphasis on community.”
“They feel homier.”
“Everyone knows everyone.”
(Many of the folks who commented grew up in small towns, too, so some people love it in their real lives, not just fiction.)
I do love books with that feeling of community–I just tend to make that community out of people (friends, family, and/or church family) and not the setting itself.
So maybe it’s not all the different. I’m trying to look at small towns with new eyes. I know my own experiences aren’t the same as everyone’s. I know not all small towns are the same. And I know I want to write books that appeal to readers — though I have to figure if I do take on a small town setting, it’s going to have my own spin on it, and, well, that might not end up being the idyllic place people picture when they hear the words “small town romance.”
What about you? I’d love to know what you love (or hate!) about small town romance and where you fall on the “community is the people I live near” to “community is the people I choose” scale.
If you have a small town romance series you’d love to recommend – hit me up with that as well! I always need something new to read.
Elizabeth Maddrey is a semi-reformed computer geek and homeschooling mother of two who lives in the suburbs of Washington D.C. When she isn’t writing, Elizabeth is a voracious consumer of books. She loves to write about Christians who struggle through their lives, dealing with sin and receiving God’s grace on their way to their own romantic happily ever after.
I’m a community is the people I choose type person.
I love the often quirky nature of some secondary characters in small town romances.
The quirky characters can certainly be super fun!
Hi Elizabeth. In SW Michigan I consider myself living in a small rural community. Our town has about 10,000 people. Last fall I was picking up Chicken at our local Chicken Coop and I started a conversation with a couple waiting in line. The lady mentioned a busy community for 1800 people. I had to think quickly. They were buying a home in small village in the area. So I explained that the Twin Cities area has a population of over 20,000 people and we are the county seat. The small town term is relative to demographics. Having taught in our community, I know many people; but it is still large enough that I have some privacy. We have everything we need: two excellent school systems, a good hospital, independent shops, restaurants, museums, arts, theater and more. Minus the headaches of living in a metropolitan area like Chicago – traffic and more. Happy Holidays. Best wishes.
Small is definitely a subjective term! The “small town” I grew up in was about 18,000 people when we lived there, which is definitely not tiny when lined up with other options.
I love small town community….I want the personal connection of people who will be there in good times and bad. I live in a large city and have no family near and it can be quite isolated in a city of over 1 million.
Do you feel you can find and create that community at church or in your neighborhood or workplace? Or you don’t feel it’s the same?
I grew up in a small town in mid Michigan, population now is about 1,600 people. How many were there in the 60s & 70s when I was growing up was far less, no doubt. One thing I always loved was walking down to the corner to church. We never had to shovel out our car in the winter to get there! When my husband & I were there with our infant daughter I wouldn’t have traded it for anything! Yes, everyone knew everyone’s business but you never needed help when there was someone-usually multiple people ready to help! I also happened to love being so close to many in my immediate family. You could see my parent’s house from my back deck, my Aunt & Uncle’s house from my front window and my Grandparent’s house from the front yard. I didn’t have an love story in town, my husband & I met elsewhere, but I do love to read about them! I was blessed to have so many positive experiences in a small town! To this day things like not knowing my neighbors bugs me, it just seems wrong! 😉
I live 9 miles away from there now but in so many ways wish I was still living there. I guess that even though I have moved 16 times since leaving my parents’ house I have never lived more than 11 miles from my childhood home! That fact alone pretty much says it all!
I live in a small, college town. We don’t have a movie theater. It’s very rural here and it’s a great place to raise kids and a great place to teach. I am 10 miles away from a town where I usually shop and an hour away from several large cities and airports. I grew up in a large college town.
I’m still very close to my family here in the burbs :) so it can be done. And I do like having family close by. I think that can be true in small town, big town, big city, or whatever.
Sometimes the small town people help each other but at other times , they might be too much in your business . I enjoyed reading about the small towns but wonder how I would feel living in one :)
Good small town series:
Clover Park – by Kylie Gilmore
Wishing Well Texas by Melanie Shawn
Lucky Harbor, and Cedar Creek by Jill Shalvis
College towns are their own special animal, I think. So many differences than a non-college town.
Yay! Thanks for recommendations! I’ll check them out.
Small towns appeal because we live in a lonely, digital world and people feel isolated. That can be hard and unhealthy. I’ve met many people who told me they never ever met their next door neighbors after years of sharing a street or block or apartment building.
A sense of community commitment and taking the good along with the (relative) bad feels like family even if it isn’t.
In my neighborhood we care. We’re all ranchers of some sort and we know each other’s names and phone numbers and kids. We catch escaped horses, tell each other when coyotes are running around chicken coops and the men plow the snow in our driveways.
Most people want some kind of connection and books with that kind of like give us the feels.
I agree with you there! Nothing better than being close to your family! I feel I was doubly blessed to have that and my love for our town both together for those years. Now all but my Daddy & I are left making me even more thrilled to have had those very special memories! I was so blessed to be close enough to care for Grandma daily for her last precious years. Being given that gift is one I will be forever grateful for!
You’re right that “small town” is somewhat subjective. We live eight miles out of a town of about 6,000. Although neither my husband nor I grew up here, we’ve lived here about 3/4 of the last 40 years, so it’s definitely home. I love that when I go into town, I ALWAYS run into at least a few people I know.
But when I happen to be in town with my daughter-in-law, she takes it to a whole new level! She may have only lived here for ten years, but she is super-outgoing and has had several public-facing jobs (from managing the local farmers market to sitting on town council and a few in between) and she can’t walk twenty feet without stopping to talk to someone she knows!
I also love that our neighbors have our back (and have proved it).
Of course, these days, I rarely get into town for more than a grocery pickup (they don’t deliver this far out), and when I do, it is harder to recognize someone when they’re wearing a mask! But I did manage to get a baby to giggle the other day by making eyes at her, even though she couldn’t see my smile, so that was a win.
I love that you have a close knit neighborhood!
Aw. Yay for baby giggles.
And for neighbors who have put action to their words of having your back.
I love this post! I grew up in Orlando. With the exception of my local church community, “small town” was a novelty. When looking for colleges to attend, I was immediately drawn to a tiny school in the mountains of North Carolina. A few of the things you mention definitely drew me to the area. A different sense of community. Familiarity of neighbors. A deep-seeded history with the land and the people. It was refreshing. The woman who became my best friend grew up in a town near our school. That town (Burnsville, NC) became the inspiration for my Laurel Cove Romance contemporary series.
So, I definitely fit within the group who find something comforting and relaxing about such a place. Especially compared to the hustle and bustle of a city like Orlando. However, my books are not idyllic. There are, indeed, busy bodies and downsides to small town living. But every type of setting has its pros and cons. That’s life, right? Both flawed and wonderful folks exist everywhere. :)
That’s definitely true — there are pros and cons to everywhere (and everything, lol)!
My family moved us about 5 miles out of our town of about 20,000 (which we considered big for us) to a small farming community of 442 people when I was in the 4th grade. They had one class for each grade, and most of the kids in my class had known each other since Kindergarten. I felt like an outsider for a long time. Being shy, it was hard for me to make new friends. I eventually did. But I always tried to make the new kids feel a little more welcome than I did. My family joked that when I left for college, they had to change the population sign. ;)
When I got married, we stayed in the college town and worked on staff at the college in a city of about 40,000 people — a metropolis in my eyes. I hated it. I could drive for 45 minutes from one side of the city to the other and never see a wild area — only manicured lawns as far the eye could see. I felt boxed in. And I hated the traffic.
When we moved up here to NC to be closer to his parents, they settled in a small town of 2,700. We found a house outside of the city limits in the next town of about 22,000, and we live in a small subdivision. Our neighbors don’t really talk to each other.
Just because you live in a small town doesn’t mean you automatically feel like you belong. However, I still feel less claustrophobic out in the country. And I never have to worry about traffic. We have to be more intentional about making a place for us to feel like we belong in our church — which is big, too, and is hard to find small groups that aren’t already set in their little cliques. I think that’s something you have to work on no matter where you are, small town or big city.
That all said, I still like reading about small towns that do have a tight-knit community. I wrote my “Love is” series in a fictional town in NC based on all the things I loved about my hometown and our current town, with a college thrown in. ;) You can check out the first one for free if you sign up for my mailing list at https://www.liladiller.com/landingpagefor1.
Thanks for sharing your experience.
My hubby & I have lived in our small rural community, an hour outside our state’s capitol, for 40+yrs. The city suburbs have grown to just outside our community & I can feel the squeeze of the city sprawl. It’s only a matter of time. I love the open space we have in our area. Our mile stretch of homes, off the Cty Rd, has 5 homes, each with some acreage. We know the families on either side of us, and a few more down the road, plus a few other families in the area our kids knew from school. But because of the spread between properties, we are more “country” than “small village” and we certainly don’t know that many. I love it here. It is more private then most “village” type books available – which suits me fine.
I tend to read more books similar to our lifestyle (ranch or farm type), than “small villages” fiction because I don’t enjoy the “busybody” characters often found in the latter (or in real life). Or if I do grab one, I read the blurb carefully to sift out the ones which revolve around that type. (I cringe just thinking of being in the same space as such people). But then, I also prefer books with the conflict occurring outside the characters (setting or bad guy) than between the characters themselves). ;). I’m a bit of an odd duck.
No, unfortunately, I have never been able to do that. The city is huge, people travel over an hour just to get to work…and you are still in Jacksonville, lol.
I grew up in an area just 15 minutes from NYC and it had a a very small town feel, new all the neighbors and they adults looked out for the kids. Neighborhood surrounded a lake we spent summer days at and ice skated in winter….sigh…I miss that.
I use to say to penpals I lived in a small country town. My friend said she did too only 100,000 in her town. I was like you call that small. I was talking less than 5,000. then another penpal said her town has 500 people. that is small. I also found that she had other towns very close by where as we have little communities within 20 mins but the next town is about 30 mins away. the regional centre an hour a way.
I like romance in small towns because, you already know alot of the people and people talk, sometimes you hear nice things and sometimes you don’t. I like it that the book characters can go on hikes or picnics and even if they want to go on a dare in the big city they can , especially if it isn’t too far.
I do like books set in small town cos of the way they all come together to do things. I also know this isn’t what actually happens. Yes many will join together for the community and will help each other but there is also struggles etc. Here if you are a smaller town you probably don’t have a medical center so need to go 20 – 30 mins or more to go to a dr. You won’t have a hospital. You may have a small supermarket with limited stock. May have a pub/hotel but not all will and probably a petrol/gas station and maybe a church but not all will.
Here my town use to be 5,000 but now is around 6,000. But we don’t have the bigger stores and often have to go to the city to see a medical specialist and the regional center to do some shopping. (we are about to lose our only variety store with clothing, etc. we do have a couple more expensive clothes stores but not much) which means more online buying or going to the regional city an hour away.
In books small towns seem to have everything which can happen in books and I think it adds to the magic. Its what we would like and reading it makes it feel good.
We had a lot of kids go to boarding school for high school. I also know of teens who lived with other family away from the area to get a new start. Once a trouble maker everyone thinks you will always be. Like you said there are downsides. Our town has bit of snobbery happening and often when looking for work it is not what you know but who you know. Often I would go for a job cos they had to advertise but it was already filled with friends kids etc.
Hi Michigander Deb! I have lived in 6 Michigan towns and for 10 years in the Chicago area. Lived in Kalamazoo, Battle Creek and Grand Rapids. I prefer St. Joseph/ Benton Harbor area. I or family have lived in this area since 1950s. My grandkids chuckle when I take a series of back roads that not even their father (my oldest son) knows. I walked to school grades K – 12. Have lived on both sides of the St. Joseph River. Lots of history. Know all the homes in the area that my great uncle built in the 1950s. Gives a sense of community in the area. Know many of the churches through family and friends. What Michigan city to you live near???? Best wishes.
I agree with what you said. The town I grew up in will always be home and I loved it when we were there. We didn’t move because of this but now I will stay here (the town I live in now has around 8,000 instead of 1,600) for convenience. Doctors, hospital, more than 1 grocery store, etc. I’m getting older and have many health issues and need things not offered in the town I grew up in. It still isn’t a big city but I’m only about 20 minutes from the state’s capitol.
There are definitely both pros and cons to anyplace! I know plenty about the busybodies and troublemakers, in both the smaller town I grew up in and where I am now as well as the loving communities! I have a pull towards the books set in smaller towns but I love ranching books and city life ones as well. I believe all it takes is a skilled writer and inspiration from God and any book can be a tremendous gift, no matter what the setting!!! 😊 There are many of you in this group who fit that perfectly! I am so grateful for you!
Oh my! 100,000?! I guess I’m scared what big is :)
I do tend to prefer lower drama books myself. And that definitely removes the busy body character (or at least usually lol)
The availability of outdoor recreation is definitely a pro of the smaller town or rural community!
Ohhh the who you know thing is a pain. That does happen here in the city as well tho.
Hi Renate, my fellow Michigander!! I grew up in Ovid, Ovid-Elsie High School. The towns are 6 1/2 miles apart & the school was in the middle of the two. I walked all through too. In high school we had to ride a bus but caught them at the junior high so still had to walk to there. Elsie has Green Meadows farms, a huge dairy producer (largest family owned in the country). I have always lived in Ovid, Owosso or St. Johns. Ovid is in the middle of the others, a 20 mile area. I’m in St. Johns now (huge in mint production) and we’re about 20 miles north of Lansing. I love to just take off and drive around on the country roads so I smiled when you talked about that! When we were growing up that was a common form of family entertainment. Just riding around looking at the crops and all. I love all the old family homes and the history as well. So much beautiful country, homes and history all over. Each one of the towns close to us has a big festival through the summer months and have them one a month from June through October. You don’t get bored really! I have friends in K-Zoo & G. R. I also have a niece in G. R. What a small world, isn’t it? One of my author friends lives in southern MI too–Cheri Swalwell, I just love our state and all it has to offer. It is always nice to meet another who lives so close and has a common love of our beautiful state!
I love small towns because of the sense of community (even if they are too noisy sometimes lol).
Well, “community is the people I live near” or “community is the people I choose” – I don’t know…I think it’s both for me :)
Ha. That’s fair! It doesn’t necessarily have to be one or the other
I loved the Glenbrooke series by Robin Jones Gunn!
Oh yes! Great series.
What I loved or hated about small towns? hmmm I lived in smaller than small, no stores. Everyone within 7 miles of us were farmers of fishermen. We grew what we needed. The only non-residential building in our community was our family church and the Grades 1-12 one classroom, one teacher school. Attended church on Sunday morning, Sunday night, Wednesday night and Friday night, and school Monday to Friday. Romance – none. We were all related somehow to someone. LOL Not really, but it was hard to fine sweet romance. My first boyfriend was our 18 year old student minister. When I broke up with him, my first cousin dated him.
Oh wow! That’s true small town for sure!
I do enjoy small town novels. I get what you’re saying though with not being able to get away in a small town. People think you are the way you were in high school but you’ve actually changed in the years since!
I love small town romance. Though I live in suburbia, I’m a small town girl at heart.
I live in a small country town & have camped here since I was a baby. I met my husband camping here & our kids have grown up all here as well.
I grew up in a town of 600. Most of my memories of relationships are not happy ones. The setting, though, was beautiful. I enjoy small town stories because they usually idealize the relationships. I don’t enjoy busybody or gossiping characters. My own family suffered from the effects of untrue and unkind words. So, unless there’s a comeuppance involved, I prefer not. I think the small town setting, though, speaks to our desire for healthy relationships. Since stories can display those easily, it becomes a common ground for more than one kind of HEA.
me too. besides our state capital we have no towns with that much population. I say small is around my town and that is a larger small town.
I agree with medical requirements. thankfully we do have visiting specialists but it can take awhile to get in. The good thing is with most visiting specialist they operate here and being a public holiday that is free. But for things like neurologists you have to go to the city which I go to 3 times a year. its around 4 hours by car with a stop and 5 by bus. (I get a community car and we do a day trip). It’s things like clothes shopping and some other things most need to go to a larger centre over an hour away. I go once or twice a year if I can get a ride. (could really use some new clothes some thing you have to try on before buying).
I forgot to mention Dry Creek by Janet Tronstad and also Wings of Refuge (think thats the title) by Cheryl Wyatt its a loving community.
Hi Deb! I also like to take back road trips through our gorgeous state. When I taught in Onaway and returned home, I always drove through St. John’s. My middle son lives in Grand Rapids. Best wishes.
It’s much harder to grow and be allowed to change in a small town.
Have you ever lived in one? Would you go back if you had the opportunity?
Aww. That’s a sweet story!
I think you probably nailed it with the comment that it speaks to idealized healthy relationships and our desire for that.
Thanks!!
I live in a small town and there are definitely pros and cons to it :-) I do like to read small town fiction because I can relate to them. I agree more with “community is the people I choose”, those I can connect with & have friendships/relationship with.
A small town series I enjoyed was put out by Love Inspired and written by Jessica Keller called “Goose Harbor”. I love how the characters interacted with each other and formed strong bonds of community. Such a fun series!
My cousins on my Daddy’s side live in a small town. When we were little and went to visit, people we didn’t know knew who we belonged to, and that we were visiting from FL. It’d even make the weekly paper!