Sometimes I have trouble coming up with blogging ideas. It’s easy when I have a book coming out, but even that wears a little thin after a while. (Last month I told you about my upcoming April release…so it doesn’t seem fair that I talk about that release again in April, now does it? You don’t want to get bored reading this blog, and I don’t want to get bored writing for it.) So as my blogging deadline approached, I decided to randomly write down blogging ideas on a piece of notebook paper.
What I’ve Learned About Life From Playing Pinochle
Top Ten Things to Learn From Playing Cards With Your Kids
Some of the Many (and Sometimes Painful) Ways God Has Grown My Patience
Who On Earth Invented the Cronut? And Why?
Why Bakery Doughnuts Are Far Superior to Store-bought Doughnuts
That’s sort of how brainstorming works. You end up with a lot of weird stuff before you hit on the one that resonates. So here we are, and I’m talking about some of the things I’ve learned from being a writer. (That’s better than Cronuts and Patience, right?)
Some readers will love what you write. Some won’t. I get good reviews. I get bad reviews. I’ve gotten reviews from readers who disliked my book because it was about x, y, and z – even though the blurb clearly stated it was about x, y, and z. And I’ve had readers who have never left a review but who have contacted me through my website to tell me how something I wrote in my book spoke right to the heart of the issue they were dealing with and how thankful they are that God gave me that story because it was exactly what they needed. I’ve also had readers contact me just to thank me for giving them a good laugh. It’s not possible to please everyone. The world is filled with all kinds of readers who have different likes and dislikes, and that’s okay. Just because someone doesn’t like one of my books – that doesn’t mean they’re a bad person. It just means I’m not the author for them. I can live with that. At the end of the day, I want to be able to stand before God unashamed and know that I’ve written the story He gave me to write.
Writing is a ministry. Or at least a mission project. I recently referred to my writing as a ministry, and I got a funny look from the person I was talking to. That’s when I realized not everyone has the same definition for ministry and if people misunderstand what you mean by that word, they can completely misread what you’re trying to tell them. So I’ve amended my statement. God has given me a ministry – but you can call it a mission project if you’re more comfortable with that. ^_^ Writing isn’t just about the book. It’s about the people, too. I’ve built relationships with readers, with other authors, with editors, with book promoters, and even with people who design swag. I have met so many people as I’ve pursued this thing called writing, and in each and every case, I believe that God has brought those people into my life intentionally…and that I should treat them with intentionality. In every single case, with every person that I come into contact with, it’s important that I remember I am Christ’s ambassador. It’s important that I love people right where they’re at and that I do my part to show them the love of Christ.
Royalties don’t always get paid on time. This is a reality of writing, and it hits both indie and traditionally published authors. It’s one of those things that I look at as a life lesson. Don’t spend the money before it’s in the bank. Don’t promise someone you’ll have their money on such-and-such a date because that’s when your royalties usually come in. Be smart. Be sensible. Understand that far too much of what goes on in this world is beyond your control.
Teenage boys don’t make the best judges when it comes to romance covers. I had a book coming out through a publisher, and the cover artist sent me two variations of the cover and asked which I preferred. I showed them both my son (age 14 at the time) and asked which cover shouted, “Read me!” He took his time looking from one to the other before answering me. Apparently, neither of the covers made him want to read the book. Silly me! That’s what I get for asking the kid who wouldn’t touch a romance book with a ten foot pole which cover is better. So the lesson here? Know your audience. If you need input, get it from your audience – from the people you’re trying to reach, from the people you want to clamor to buy your books. (And whatever you do, avoid asking teenage boys to help you pick out romance covers.)
God’s grace is sufficient. Always. Sometimes I make mistakes. (Shocker, right?) I say the wrong thing, misspell something on a social media post, or get words like sequins and sequence mixed up while writing. Mistakes happen. 
But God’s grace covers it all. The most important part is that I seek to serve Him with what I’m doing – from the writing to the social media – and that I do my best. If I’m seeking to serve God, and I’m doing the best I can, then I’m good. God is not standing by and waiting to drop the hammer on me over mistakes that, in the big scheme of things, are really quite small. This is a hard lesson for a perfectionist to learn. Not that I’m a perfectionist in every area of my life, but I’ve been known to put way more pressure on myself that is strictly wise. Living in the midst of God’s grace helps me to avoid doing that.
Thank you for sticking with me and sharing a little bit of what I’ve learned from writing. I’ll be back next month to finish the list.
In the meantime, can you tell me about an experience in your life that has taught you something profound?
One random commenter will be selected to win a $5 Amazon Gift Card.
Heather Gray loves coffee, God, her family, and laughter – not necessarily in that order! She writes approachable characters who, through the highs and lows of life, find a way to love God, embrace each day, and laugh out loud right along with her. And, yeah, her books almost always have someone who's a coffee addict. Some things just can't be helped. Despite their different lives and situations, Heather’s characters have something in common. They're all flawed...but loved anyway.
“Teenage boys don’t make the best judges when it comes to romance covers.” This made me laugh, Heather. :) I’m looking forward to Part Two!
Thanks for sharing, Heather. Also looking forward to Part Two. I really would love to reading your thoughts on Top Ten Things to Learn From Playing Cards With Your Kids. Our 3 year old granddaughter loves to play GO FISH. While she starts playing with the basic rules, by the end we play her rules. Regardless what phase of our lives, life is a learning process and God’s grace is sufficient. Blessings this Easter season. Happy Spring and Happy Writing.
Thanks for sharing your experience as a writer. It was fun reading your brainstorming ideas and guessing how you’d connect those with romance.
Hi Heather,
As an avid reader (now recuping from back surgery), I enjoyed your post…..sorry you labored so with it…it is a winner!
Keep up the great writing!
The look on his face made me laugh. In fact, just remembering it STILL makes me laugh! ^_^
My son and I recently learned to play Pinochle, and now we’re teaching my husband. It’s been so much fun to see my son learn a new card game at age 17. He handles it so differently than he did when he was three, or from when he was ten, or even from thirteen. And you’re right. I’m pretty sure there are some good lessons in there. There are more teachable moments in game-play than in just about any other single activity I’ve done with my kids over the years, and those teachable moments aren’t always for the kids. ;)
I ❤️ all of these writings.
Ha! My brainstorming is always a product of what I’ve most recently done in my life. (I had a cronut for the first time the day I sat down to write this post, and it was store-bought. ^_^ ) But eventually, as my brain leaps from one thing to another, a spark will light, and one random thought (like “things I’ve learned from playing cards”) will lead to a usable one (like “things I’ve learned from writing”), and an idea is born. Now, how I’d tie any of those to romance…we’ll see if I’m good enough to do that. ;)
Thanks for stopping by today Jackie! I hope your recovery is going well and that it’s giving you lots of time to read and spend time with people you love. ^_^
Thank you for visiting today, Ruth!
Ministries are interesting things. God calls us to different places to be a reflection of His light. Not all of us are called to preach before groups. Not all of us are singers, or teachers of the Word. But, God needs “hands and feet” to take His ways into the lives of others, in as many ways as possible. Your writings show the love of Christ and the possibles for a person who has a relationship with Christ. As someone who is not a writer, I am so glad You are!
Thank you so much Marcia! And how beautifully stated. You’re absolutely right. We’re all to be His hands and feet, but we’re not all called to walk the same path. Blessings!
Teenage boys picking covers for romance novels…LOL! Here’s what I think: always put a horse on the book cover. You can’t go wrong with that–both sexes find them romantic.
Heather, I’m with the others who said that your comment about teenage boys and romance book covers made me laugh.
That’s too funny! As a teenager, I read so many horse books… Now as an adult, when I see a horse on a cover, I tend to think it’s a YA book. (Unless there’s a handsome cowboy standing next to it.) ^_^
Now I get to tell my son what a great job he’s done entertaining people today. ^_^ Or maybe not. He might be afraid to ever speak again… ;)
Lol on your son and the cover choice. I have enjoyed your stories I’ve read and find them both humorous and well plotted to keep those pages turning, and I get that writing is a ministry. You never now who you will reach with your writing. As far as something profound I’ve learned. I’m really not sure.
Great post! As a reader I have learned that each writer has different giftings, different ways that they are lead, different writing styles, different choices they make. I have found that I can be greatly blessed by being open to seeing what God has put on each author’s heart, and seeing how each author is gifted. I read to be encouraged, to relax, to laugh, to learn, and even to try to solve mysteries. The written word is a precious thing to me, as are the various author’s giftings. I also feel like the authors usually pour their hearts out in their books, so I always try to treat them carefully. I can truthfully say that I have been greatly blessed by a wonderful group of authors!! Thank you!
thanks for sharing your insights about writing. I love that authors and readers can connect through stories. Thanks fir sharing with us .
great interview and thanks for the laugh too!
LOL! I loved every single thing about this post! Yes, I consider my writing a ministry too, so I try not to worry about poor sales or the occasional bad review. If God asks us to write a book and His plan is for it for only reach one specific reader, we’d better go with it!
Heather, you make me laugh! When I think about teenage boys choosing a cover, I have to laugh out loud. You are so encouraging and honest in your messages.
One experience, of many, in my life that has taught me valuable lessons is when my Mother was living in a nursing home. Daily visits with her allowed my family to meet other residents who didn’t have family or friends to visit. So we would always visit with as many people as we could. Cherished friendships were formed.
Love your Life Lessons!
From all I’ve read, you’re definitely more than good enough to do that, but I’m still curious about how’d you do it. ;) It would be even funnier.
I’m recovering from my niece visiting for 3 days with her 3 and 7 year olds… so have no profound comments to add here :-)
I’m so glad you could stop by today Andrea! And thank you for the kind words!
You bless my heart, Becky. It’s good to know that there are readers out there who are looking to be blessed by each author they read. Hugs!
Your post resonatedin many ways for me. As always, thanks for writing and seeking to deserve God in it. That is a huge blessing for me. I just retired from doing 30 years of in home day care. (We also sold our house and drove two cars for two days to my sons house. Next week we’ll land at my daughters house while we house hunt. ) I would describe my day care as a ministry, and some people gave me strange looks. As we were leaving, though, many, many former daycare parents and children thanked us.
It was a blessing that they were blessed by it .
I’m glad you could stop by today Deana! As an author, I love to connect with readers! It’s such fun to see what’s going on in their lives and to learn the different ways that my stories have intersected with them.
Anytime Sheila! :)
Amen! My job is to write the story God has given me and then to trust Him to put it into the hands of the people He wants to read it. (And then to remind myself not stress about it if it feels like the book hasn’t done as well as I think it should have.)
That IS a profound lesson. Being alone in a strange place and not having visitors – it’s so hard on morale. I’m glad you and your family took time to visit the other residents and that you formed those relationships. What a beautiful testimony of being God’s hands of feet, of letting Him use you. Hugs!!
Thanks for visiting today Valerie! :D
Hahahaha!!!! Three days!? And you lived to tell the tale… I’m impressed! (And tired on your behalf!) ^_^
Your in-home daycare WAS a ministry. And not just to those kids, either, but also for the parents. You blessed them and shined God’s light into their lives in a real and tangible way, I have no doubt. Part of living for Christ is walking through each and every day following in the footsteps He has left for us WHILE walking beside the other people in our life – both saved and unsaved. Who we are in Christ shows to the people around us whether we realize it or not. Hugs!! For all you’ve done in the past – and for all the changes you’re going through right now. I can’t wait to hear about the ministry God has waiting for you when you finally land. :)
I loved this and can’t wait for part two. I was laughing at the thought of your son being asked to pick which cover.
One of the things that has taught me something is learning to water color at the age of 62. All my life I have failed at art and drawing When I was teaching Kindergarten and tried drawing pictures on the board, the kids would laugh at them. But I have always wanted to be able to paint. Last summer my friends were talking about taking a watercolor class at the Senior Center so I joined with great doubt I would be able to do it. But I have kept trying each week and now I am beginning to love the class and painting. The lesson I’ve learned is to be patient and keep trying. Don’t give up.
We had a bit of a road trip this afternoon, and as we were driving along, this talk radio guy came on and started talking about Colonel Sanders. He was 65 when he decided to try to start selling the recipe for his fried chicken. He went all up and down the east coast trying to sell his recipe, and nobody was interested. He finally ended up in Toronto where someone showed an interest. Pretty soon more people showed an interest. Before you know it, a corporation reached out to him with an offer to take his recipe and franchise it…and Kentucky Fried Chicken was born. So 62? As far as trying new things goes, you’re spring chicken. ^_^ Never give up, especially when you’re walking the path God has for you. Hugs!
Thanks for your post, Heather. I enjoyed reading it. I’ve learned from connecting with readers, writers, and bloggers on Facebook that you can form wonderful friendships with others without ever meeting them in person.
Always enjoy your insight.
I really enjoy reading your work and am looking forward to your next book!
Several years ago while at work I realized that avoidance does not mean forgiveness (Profound #1). You probably know that, but it was like a brick hit me. I was talking with a co-worker and realized that I preferred not to interact with a certain client because of some history that I thought I had let it go. Apparently I hadn’t. I confessed to God and finally released the bitterness I didn’t realize I was carrying.
Maybe you’re wondering why I wrote Profound #1 above? Well, I also learned that I had stopped compartmentalizing my faith (Profound #2). How else could God hit me with a brick?
Thanks for sharing. I look forward to your next post :)
How true! I’ve met friends, prayer partners, and more through online engagement with readers and other writers. It’s been fantastic!
Thank you for stopping by today Kathy!
Thank you for sharing Julianne! Those are both amazing insights, but I’ll tell you – the one that excites me the most is #2 because that one – that’s going to lead you to all kinds of other profound spiritual insights. Hallelujah! What an amazing God we serve!
After my father passed away it gave me a huge well of compassion for those who have lost a close loved one. Before that I didn’t fully understand how grief can affect a person. It also deepened my faith and gratitude for Christ.
I really liked your post. It was both profound and funny. I like the idea of writing as a ministry. My mom always taught me how our job can also be God’s calling to our lives and we should consider it as a ministry.
And also, thanks for reminding that God’s grace is always sufficient! It’s something we need to be reminded every day! :)
Nice blog post.
I would love to win
Great post Heather!
About reviews; I write a LOT of book reviews since I am part of a vast amount of authors street/early read teams. What I’ve found, I may not always like the book I’m reading (thankfully VERY rarely) and if I can’t leave a positive review, I simply don’t. Then I will write that author and explain why, being honest, fair & non-hurtful in my email. There is never an excuse to be ugly to an author, in my humble opinion. If I don’t like a book, it’s not because of the author themselves, but most likely that particular book or writing style. I’ve also found some books by the same author I really love don’t resonate with me. It may be the book topic, theme or again, the writing style of that particular book. Any number of factors come into play for me! I’ve read a vast variety of books, subjects, themes, and styles to know what I like or don’t like. :-) But again, I really try to be fair and honest about them in my review. There have been very few times that I’ve left less than a three star review; and in those cases I make clear what I like first & then what I don’t like secondly. Being un-hurtful in my comments. And if I find I can’t say something in a nice way, I take my mother’s advice and don’t say anything at all!
And as for writing being a ministry; I TOTALLY see it as that for writers! God can use anything in anyone’s life to speak to others. I think of writing a book as being able to reach vast hundreds of people with just one story. Write what God places in your heart to write, you never know what the reader will get out of it or how God will speak to them. God has used books in my life to encourage, challenge me, or just remind me of God’s promises in my own life. The neat thing too, God can use your ONE book to speak different things to each person. Like for example, I get one thing out of a book and someone else will get something totally different out of the same book. I think if we readers open our hearts & authors write what God wants them to, it’s a win/win for us all!! You have a great opportunity to be used by God to reach out to the world :-) Isn’t that an awesome thought to ponder?
Thanks for a terrific post,I sure enjoyed reading it! On a different note; I TOTALLY agree with bakery doughnut being far superior to store-bought :-) It’s like being royally treated to a sweet treat. I NEVER by store bought….you could call me a doughnut snob…haha!
I understand what you mean Heidi. Going through a difficult time – or a tragedy – helps us to have greater patience, understanding, and compassion. I’m glad you’ve allowed God use that time in your own life to help you better reach out to and support others with love.
I’m glad you could stop by today Laura! There’s a song (and wouldn’t you know it – the artist, title, AND lyrics completely escape me at the moment) that talks about how we’re to give God our very best in every moment. Whether we’re a stay-at-home mom, whether we’re a corporate executive – whether we feel like nothing we do matters, or whether we hold the livelihoods of thousands in our hands – everything we do needs to be done for Christ, and when we take that approach, then everything we do has significance beyond what we can see.
Thank you Linda!
Thank you for stopping by today Martha! You’ve been entered in the giveaway. :-)
Doughnut snobs of the world unite! ^_^
Interestingly, bad reviews aren’t inherently bad. As a writer – especially with my early books – I learned so much from the negative reviews. They helped me to make each book better than the one before it. They helped me to understand what readers in my genre wanted and expected, and where I was missing the mark in my story telling. Despite being helpful, those reviews can still be hurtful, too. We authors tend to hold our work very close to our hearts, and the arrows that hit it tend to pierce our skin, too. But that honestly just gives us more reason to lean on God and to let Him work out those things in us – be it pride, insecurity, or something else entirely. ;)
One of the interesting things about using fiction writing to reach people is that Jesus Himself talked in story. He told parables. Jesus used the art of story to convey deep spiritual truths that changed people’s lives – that changed the world. I in no way, shape, or form compare myself to Christ – but I am deeply honored to be able to carry on the tradition of using story to deliver biblical truth into people’s lives. And how those stories touch people – you’re right. Stories touch different people in different ways. It’s part of the complexity and wonder that we all get to experience as children of God. He loves us all equally…yet has a deeply intimate and unique relationship with each one of us. And amen for that!
Sounds like a great song! I would like to listen to it someday.
It is interesting and fun to see the things you have learned from being a writer. One that really sticks out to me is “some readers will like your work and some won’t.” This is soooo true. I recently starting writing my own novel and that is a good thing for me to remember as I move forward. Not everyone will enjoy or even like what I write. But not everything is for everyone! :) Great post! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
I have a friend who says, “Not every shoe is going to fit every person.” It’s a fun way to remember that not every book is going to be a perfect fit for every reader. As long as we’re writing the stories God has given us to write, it’ll all work out. :-) Good luck and blessings on your book!
I have learned that some people can be extremely cruel. When I meet someone new, I let them talk. Oh yes…I learned that my ex was sleeping with my best friend.
I’ve been toying with ideas for several books. I’ve never written a novel lately, but they keep floating and rolling around in my head. Over the past few months I’ve hear several authors I admire talk about writing as a ministry and praying and hearing God’s voice about what to write. That’s really started sinking in, I think, and I’ve started asking God if he wants me to write and if so, what. I found your post very helpful with your thoughts on writing as ministry.
I think there have been a lot of experiences God’s given me that are profound. The biggest one over the past few years is that life will not turn out how I want it to, but God’s plan is bigger. I’m still in a waiting area of my life, but He is beginning to prompt me in certain directions, like joining the prayer ministry at church. I’m trying to learn to hear His voice over my own.