I’ve been watching a lot of C-dramas this past year and one recurring theme I’ve noticed in these shows is how there’s usually a character who’s in love with another character, but the latter character doesn’t love them back. Eeks and sigh, right? As an observer, it’s so painful to watch this type of relationship unfold and to experience all of the angsty feelings involved. I don’t know about you, but unrequited love is possibly the worst kind of love there is.
I may or may not be speaking from experience. ;)
Okay, I’ll admit it. I’ve had my fair share of unrequited love, both as the “lover” and the “lovee”. To be honest, neither side is pleasant, but it is slightly better to be the heartbreaker than to have your heart broken. Would you agree?
The funny thing I’ve realized about unrequited love is how much it truly is one-sided. When you have feelings for someone, it’s so easy to read into everything that person says or does. You find yourself hanging onto every gesture, word, and glance, and hoping beyond hope that they mean something special just for you. And the hardest part is all the rationalizing you do in your head to convince yourself that there is a future for the two of you, despite all the signs that the other person is just not into you.
Yup. Unrequited love stinks.
That’s why I really hesitated to include such a relationship in one of my books. I only finally decided to do so because I promised the character that she would get her own story with a happy ending. Not with the man she originally had feelings for, but with someone even better suited for her!
I’m talking about Danica, the lovely bookstore owner, who had a big crush on Brandon Spark in A Sudden Spark. Unfortunately, Brandon didn’t see her as more than a good friend, which was a fact Danica had to come to terms with. But the moment she met Brandon’s brother, Darren—her heart started beating again. And while she and Darren had to overcome some challenges to get to their happy ever after, she couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. Their story in At First Spark shows how sweet love can be with the right person who loves you as much as you love them.
Isn’t that the case in real life, too?
I’m so thankful that the unrequited love I had back in college never went anywhere. Even though it was painful and hard to give up on that silly one-sided dream I had, it was for the best. Because a few years later I understood without a doubt why God had allowed me to go through that heartbreak … so I could meet my hubby and marry him!
Perhaps unrequited love isn’t that bad … so long as you trust the Lord to heal your heart and to lead you to experience a real, true, and lasting love with the one he has for you.
Tell me, what do you think about unrequited love? What other CCR books have you read with this type of relationship?