When I’m writing a romance, I tend to focus on the big stuff.
The “meet-cute” is a biggy. What GREAT story can I give my hero and heroine for how they met.
Or that big moment that they announce the “L” word–you know, that first “I love you” moment.
Or the first kiss.
Or the wedding proposal.
We don’t want to get these things wrong. They are SUPER important.
But the other day, I was reminded that the little things along the way are just as, if not more, important than the big things.
I went to bed with a pretty decent headache. Usually I then wake up headache free, but not this day. I woke up feeling like someone had my head in a vice, almost to the point of being worried about the matter. My medical-momma brain started ticking off the horrible things that could cause a headache — upcoming stroke, aneurysm, brain cancer.
As the morning went on, my headache did not release, even though I took a big dose of Motrin.
I snapped at my kids, and since I work from home, was doing a half-hearted effort.
But then this funny thing happened.
My oldest (who is 16 and driving) said, “Mom, I’m gonna take the kids to McDonald’s okay? That way you can have a little quiet time to yourself.” She’d seen the pain in my eyes, and wanted to do something to help. So she carted all 3 of her siblings to McDonald’s and spent a good 2 hours with them there.
In the quiet of the house, I finally started to relax a little. Then I got this text message from my husband mid-day. We’d planned a date night for that evening, and I had been starting to worry that my headache would ruin the whole thing.
But here was his text (it’s a big mushy… sorry-not-sorry)
“Hey, cutie…wanna go on a date?! Movie and dinner? Popcorn and coke?! Kisses and hugs?!? :-)”
It was silly. We were already planning to go, so it wasn’t like he had to ask me. He just wanted to make something planned and a bit routine a little more romantic and fun.
I giggled as I replied to him, something flirty and, well, you don’t need to know the details of ALL our text messages :-)
About ten minutes later, I was still sitting at my computer, in the quiet house, smiling, my heart feeling loved… and it hit me.
My headache was gone. No trace of it. Zero, zip, nada.
These simple little acts of love by my family had been the balm I needed to relax my brain and ease my pain. Love can, quite literally, heal.
And today, as I’m sitting here thinking back on it, I am realizing that I need to put just as much effort into the small things as I do the big things. Because the big things are expected. The proposal is SUPPOSED to be a big part. Anniversaries, birthdays, etc. All expected romantic stuff. But a stolen kiss during dish washing, or spontaneous hug out of the blue, or an unexpected letter or gesture that shows the love that goes beyond the surface… that’s the good stuff, y’all.
Krista Phillips writes inspirational romance with a dash of smiles. She believes a sprinkle of laughter (and a wee bit of chocolate) makes everything a little better! She blogs regularly about life as a wife, mother, follower of Jesus, and mother of a child with a rare congenital heart defect at www.kristaphillips.com. She is represented by Sarah Freese of WordServe Literary.
Hi Krista, how beautiful and true:) Thanks for sharing, glad your headache has passed.
Blessings:)
I’ve learned that most of the times its the little things that we don’t think much that really matters. Glad those little (yet big) gestures help to get rid of your headache.
Such a good point! Those sweet, unexpected romantic moments (in life or in books) make all the difference.
Great post….love it! Glad you are feeling better!
Thanks :-)
Totally agree!!!
I always try to put them in my book, but am definitely going to focus on them more now!! They are the heart-melt-moments!
Thanks, Jackie!!
Krista, thanks for sharing and thanks for trading places with me. I think my hubby is more romantic than me sometimes even though I’m the romance writer.
I know I feel much more romantic when my hubby helps with the dishes, or taking out the trash, or vacuming! :-)
Aw, I love the sweetness!
Wonderful post, Krista! Hope that was a great date night with your sweetie!
Awww! The Feels!! How precious!!
It helped me out a ton too, so yeah!! My hubby goes through spurts, ha! He definitely has his good moments :-)
LOL! Yes, acts of service are definitely romantic!!!
:-) :-) Thanks!
It was!! We went and watched Wonder Woman then went to a nice dinner at our favorite restaurant!
I know, right?? I love my family!!!!
Thanks for the reminder that I have much to cherish.
Love this post, Krista. Such a good reminder to find joy in the little things!
Love this post. Yes to the little things!
I agree, the little stuff is BIG :-)
Especially after the wedding (even after many years)…the stolen kiss, the brush of a hand as you walk by, the special looks you give each other, the secret unspoken language you have developed, notes stuck in a lunch kit, etc! It keeps the spark alive and connects you two in a way that bonds you stronger together. :-)
One of my husbands love languages are words of affirmation. So I try to tell him at least one thing a day to boost him up. It really makes a huge difference, you know?
AWww…I love your family came through for you! :D Esp that sweet text from hubby :)