I’ve got a problem with pets. It’s not that I don’t like them—I love animals, and we’ve had pets in the past.
But all my memories of pets are linked to the pain of loss.
It began when I was four. Following a major family crisis, my mother, siblings, and I were staying with my cousins. I used to spend hours playing with the rabbits they kept in the backyard.
One afternoon, I got home from kindergarten to find the rabbit hutch empty and an unusual-looking stew being served for dinner.
Nobody had told me that the adorable rabbits I thought were pets were actually being raised for the table. I had my personal bunny boiler trauma way before Fatal Attraction came out.
A couple of years later, my mother got us a lovely dog, whom we named Tippy. I’m not sure what breed Tippy was, but she was small with a long, silky, motley coat of black, golden brown, and white. Mama took Tippy to the vet to get her spayed. But something went wrong after the operation, and Tippy died just days later.
Mama’s close friend saw how gutted we were and loaned us her dog. Dankudi was a short-haired white mutt with crooked ears. We loved that puppy and had so many great times with him.
Then Mama got a job overseas, and we had to move. Dankudi went back to his home, but Mama’s friend told us that for months after we left, he would keep running to our old house to look for us. My heart broke when I thought about poor little Dankudi not being able to understand where his friends had gone.
Years after that, when I was a teenager, we had another dog.
Duchess was a German Shepherd and Great Dane cross. She was beautiful, regal, and smart and ran as fast as a greyhound. She had a good, long life, but in the end, she got cancer and had to be put down.
We also loved and lost two sassy cats, Sheba and Tashbaan. Sheba was handsome enough to be a pinup model, and, boy, did he know it. But Tashbaan was always getting clobbered by the neighbourhood bully, a vicious white tomcat who once chased Tashbaan all the way into our living room.
After that, I was done with pets. Losing them hurt too much.
I decided that a few years of love and companionship weren’t worth the sorrow of saying goodbye.
Now, with four children, the inevitable question has come up: “Mum, can we get a pet?” So far, the answer has been no.
In my novel, Through the Blaze, my hero’s dog has a special role in his recovery.
But pets have been finding their way into my stories lately. I wrote a women’s fiction novella where a Cavalier King Charles spaniel changes the heroine’s life. And in my novel, Through the Blaze, my hero’s dog has a special role in his recovery.
In the book I’m working on now, a cat sidled into the story and, as cats always do, she has laid claim to the comfiest spot.
Perhaps writing about pets is my way of experiencing the joys of having an animal friend vicariously. And maybe the door I thought I’d closed has opened just a crack, and there could be a family pet in our future.
Do you have a pet? Could you share about the animals who have enriched your life?
I write fiction that reflects my Christian faith. I love happy endings, heroes and heroines who discover sometimes hard but always vital truths, and stories that uplift and encourage. My family and I live in the east of England where we enjoy rambling in the countryside, reading good books and making up silly lyrics to our favorite songs.
Hi Milla! This German laughed at your rabbit story. I was born post WW2 in Berlin and my Oma had rabbits, geese and chickens – definitely a Oma Garden to table experience. The only way we had protein. Weiss Gasthaus, a German restaurant in South Bend, IN in the winter makes Hasenpfeffer (rabbit stew).
Our beloved tri colored Sheltie Penny passed in 2018. Hubby and I were in our late sixties. Penny was my dog, but so gentle and kind to kids and grand babies. We decided that at our age if we got a new dog, the dog might outlive us and that would be fair to the dog. So now we share Sheltie Ivy with our son. Pets enrich our lives and have their own personalities. We have been blessed and entertained with our pets: a canary winged bee bee parrot Laura, a Hermit crab Herbie, cats Mimi, Smokey, and Abbey, and Shelties McBeth and Penny. Enjoy your Mother’s Day. Best wishes.
I have 2 rescue cats. They keep me on my toes. Had them for just over 4 years now. I cat sat 2 for 8 months before these two and part of the reason for getting my own was I knew I would miss Lilly and Maia so much.
Growing up I got my first pet of my own at 8 a cat that I had a couple years then I got a budgie that up and fell of his perch. He was old but it was only a few months, a friend gave me another who worked out how to get out and after the second time didn’t get him back.
then I got Touser my cat he was my cat and was very much a one person cat. would walk me to the top of the drive way and be there when I got home from school in it time I was gone mum didn’t see him. After him I got Meggs who decided he liked wandering and had another home. Then we got the claytons cat Horse (from footrot flats) he was the neighbours but loved me more and when they got a new dog he wouldn’t go home so became ours. It is sad when they die but I wouldn’t give up the times of love. I had around 10 years without any cats and I did miss them. When mum passed away all I wanted was a cat like horse had been that I could talk to and cuddle. Also I have found since getting these two it has helped me deal with the pain and stress so much more (even if they cause some at times). Having them to focus on or just pet really does help.
I hope you will give pets another go at some stage.
I had a stray kitten adopt me when my son found it. I truly believe God sent him to me as I was going through a divorce and a lonely, quiet house when the kids were with their dad. I greatly miss him but have fond memories of Cuddles.
My husband and I got a toy poodle when she was about 10 years old. She lost her sight and hearing, so we had to have her put to sleep when she was 18 years old. We cried like babies. We never got any more pets. Even now that I’m by myself, since my husband passed away, I have chosen not to get a pet. I like to travel to visit family, and many of them don’t want a pet in the house. I don’t have money to board one.
Have a beautiful Mother’s Day!
I grew up spending a lot of time on my grandparents’ farm, and we had a lot of barn cats at our house as well. I’m not sure why it didn’t bother me a lot when the animals became food or when our barn cats disappeared. It was just a part of life. Now that I’m older, I have a harder time with it. We have chickens, and one of them got frostbite on her toes because the others wouldn’t let her in the coop on a night where we got a major snowstorm. We brought her inside, and I fed her strawberries by hand, but she never recovered. The day my husband took her to the vet to be euthanized, I cried. Maybe I’m becoming more sentimental as I age. It won’t stop me from having more animals in the future. They’re worth the investment. Thanks for sharing!
Hi, Renate!
My experience put me off rabbit stew and I’ve never eaten it, ha ha. But enough time has passed now that I’m willing to give it a go! We had chickens, but I never thought of them as pets, and it wasn’t a big deal when they went into the stew pot.
We had a goose once, too, but that thing was mean! And it had its revenge in death because its meat was so tough that we were never tempted to get another one.
It’s so sweet of your son to share Ivy with you.
And you actually had a pet crab? That’s well off the beaten path!
Hope you have a lovely Mother’s Day.
It was so nice to read about your pets, Jenny! Such precious stories. It’s especially touching to hear how their company has blessed you.
Hi, Lori! Wow, I totally believe that your kitten was God’s way of comforting you. What a beautiful story.
Aw, Bonnie, that must have been a heartbreaking decision. And 18 was such a long, full life for a dog! Duchess only lived until she was about 12.
That’s the challenge with pets: they make it a lot harder to travel around. My mother-in-law doesn’t have a pet for the same reason.
Thanks so much for sharing!
Chickens can be really mean to each other! The poor little mite. :-(
Growing up, I didn’t think of our chickens as pets, either, although their antics and crazy personalities amused us a lot.
I’m slowly working my way closer to the idea of having a pet. Both my brothers got their first family pets quite recently, when they were well into their forties, so there’s still hope for me!
Thanks so much for your comment.
Hi Milla, my children ask a lot about getting pets too, it’s such a big responsibility and as you say, so sad when you lose them. I keep telling them once everyone is out of nappies I may think about having an animal to clear up after which puts off the decision a bit.
We had a cat growing up who I really loved, he had a good long life and sied of old age, and I was in my 20s and had left home by that time, but I still cried and cried. My manager at work at the time turned out to be a cat person, she was quite a strict boss but I’ll always remember how kind she was when it happened.
When I was growing up, we had cats, as Mom liked cats, and all four of us girls did, too. My Daddy, though, didn’t like cats, and didn’t really care for dogs, either, until the last cat we had came along. We had two dogs growing up, but one died young, and the other decided he liked being on the streets better than with us, which only upset one of us, the one sister that liked dogs. Our last cat we got as a kitten, and Smokey didn’t know that Daddy didn’t like cats, so he played with Daddy before Daddy left for work each morning. He would wait at the door every day for Daddy to come home from work. He became Daddy’s cat and just tolerated the rest of us! I don’t have pets now, as I’ve decided I don’t like litter boxes well enough to have a cat, and I don’t want a dog.
Pets often bring out the gentler side of people!
I hear you about waiting until the children are grown. For sure, the added responsibility and work involved in taking care of a pet is another reason we’ve put off getting one.
I laughed out loud at the kitten who didn’t know your dad didn’t like cats. So funny!
Milla, I love your honesty. My world has been saturated with pets at every step. I’ve lost much but I’ve loved much. 💓 Sounds like a story line to me. *wink*
I have never really been a pet person. Growing up, Mom always said no to pets. Although, I do remember a having a dog named Rex for a short time. I don’t know what happened to him. And another time, my grandmother gave me a kitten who ran away as soon as we got home. Fast forward to adulthood. My kids always wanted pets, but my husband said no. But they did have fish, turtles, and a frog. Now that they are on their own, they have pets. My daughter has 2 French bulldogs. My son has numerous pets, including a flying squirrel.
I do have a story and I apologize for this being so long. I did have a cat I called Pookie. The neighbor’s cat would come over and have her litters in our wood pile. The last litter she had, there were only 2 kittens. One day one kitten wandered out onto the road. The mama cat followed her and both were hit by a car. My husband said, “Well I guess that takes care of the cats”. The next day he said, “Guess not. There is one kitten left.” The kids and I said, Aww”. I didn’t know anything about taking care of animals, but I would put milk out for her. I put a little box and with a little blanket and a little teddy bear by my front door for her. It was October and the nights were chilly. Then I heard the coyotes. The cat came inside and stayed until she died about 3 or 4 years ago. We buried her on my son’s property with her teddy bear.
I was born a cat lover :-) I started begging my parents for a cat when I was 3, and when a stuffed cat showed up in my Christmas stocking that year, I told them, “No! I want a real cat.” My dad was a dog lover, and we had dogs, but I kept begging for a cat. I think we got the first one when I was 4. If I remember correctly, it got sick and died, and right away we got some kittens from friends. Well, the germs were still around, so they all died off quickly too. We learned to wait 30 days for the germs to be gone, and then the parade of cats in my life took off. A friend from church gave us their pregnant female, and she had a litter with a golden tabby with six toes on each foot. Butterscotch was a very special cat. My mom loved him too, and when he died when I was away at college, it hurt her too much to write and tell me he was gone. So I came home for Christmas and my sweet cat was not there! After that we had an agreement that she had to give me warning if it ever happened again. I could write a book about all the cats in my life :-) Anyway, it was hard when they went on to kitty heaven, but they have brought so much joy and fun that it’s worth the pain. Right now my husband and I have 3 cats – all from the local animal shelter at different times. They’re worth the effort, and sure are good cuddlers. We have a joke when it’s cold at night – it’s time to put on another cat.
no pets
Milla, what heartbreaking memories. I had a Tippy, he was a hunting beagle. We just rescued a beagle and Milo is nothing like Tippy!
My dad was a farmer so I remember having pet turkeys, until I didn’t.
I added a pet for the first time in Anchored Hearts, and that yappy dog has become a beloved secondary character in my series. They really grow on you, furry and fictional!
I totally get where you’re coming from. Every dog I’ve lost over the years has left a scar on my heart that’s never really healed, so each one compounds the pain. As my last one was reaching the end, and I knew it because she reached the point where she could no longer get up without assistance, I told my mom I wasn’t planning to get anymore. It’s just too hard on me when I lose them. They’re my babies.
I don’t honestly know if the moratorium will hold, but so far… it’s been 2 years since we lost our last dog, only 4 months after we lost another one who was my shadow and little heart boy, and I’m still not ready to even consider getting another one. Losing 1 at a time over the years was bad enough, but losing 2 so close together…. Let’s just say I still haven’t recovered 2 years later. I can at least look at photos of them these days without falling apart. Most days. But there’s no way I’m ready to even consider bringing another one into my life.
Death is part of life. Unavoidable. But for now, I’ll stick with freshwater aquarium fish and shrimp. I don’t get so attached to THEM.
Ha ha, you may be right about a story being in there. ;-)
Aw, I loved your story about Pookie! She chose you as her family. :-)
Ha ha, time to put on another cat! Love it! Thank you so much for sharing about your lovely cats. It does hurt so much when they go.
That’s us right now, too, bn100!
Thanks for sharing, Julie! Isn’t it amazing how their personalities are completely different, even with the same breed? I’m trying to wrap my head around the idea of a pet turkey, ha ha.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Dawn. I’m not surprised that your heart is still very raw. I can’t even imagine losing two just four months apart. It’s hard enough even with years in between. I hope the sweet memories give you some comfort.
I have had many pets in the past-hampsters, gerbils, fish, birds, guinea pig, dogs and cats. We currently have three indoor cats, Luci, Daisy and Fearless. We also feed the stray cats and kittens. Thank you so much for sharing. God bless you.
We got our first chihuahua when I was eight. I’ve had Chihuahuas on and off much of my life since then, losing most to the road. My last one lived 8 yrs before succumbing to a heart murmur.
We had a Shih Tzu that lived to be 17-1/2 yrs old when our children lived at home. We now have our second Shih Tzu.
Wow, you’re a very adventurous pet owner! Thanks for your comment, Debra.
Thanks for your comment, Becky! I don’t know what’s worse–losing a beloved pet to an accident or illness. Like you, I’ve experienced both types of loss.
Shih Tzus are adorable! They’re one of the breeds my daughter would love us to get one day.
We have had chicken,chicks dogs,puppies and kittens but we relized we aren’t animal people so we got rid of them we didn’t have them all at the same time.
Milla,
I hope you can get a Shih Tzu some day. They’re fun!
My grandfather had a cat that had been mistreated by its previous owner: it had three legs and it was always hidden, it was constantly afraid of everyone. It was called Wolf and it had a collar with a little bell around its neck to know where it was in the house.
I spent a lot of summers at my grandfather’s house when I was a child, they had 8 cats including Lobo, I got everyone to love me (especially a cat named Linda, she chose me) but Lobo would only trust my grandfather. One summer I dedicated myself to winning over Lobo, I sat at a prudent distance from him for several days until little by little he stopped fearing me and he got closer, one day when I wasn’t looking he sat near me and allowed me to caress him.
The following summer he died, he was very old, he looked for my grandfather one night and he died while he was with him.
That would have been hectic having them all at the same time!
Aw, Lilly, what a sweet, beautiful story! My heart is melting right now. Thanks so much for sharing about Lobo. Even though he had a horrific start, I’m glad he learned to trust again.