I’m going to make an assumption. You wouldn’t be reading an article on the InspyRomance blog unless you like Christian romance on some level. This post is not for people who already dismiss Christian romance as spiritual junk food: escapist, lightweight, and shallow. But you’re not like that, right? You believe that most Christian romance authors strive to depict characters who face real-life challenges and struggles while upholding their faith. Hello, friend!
Not going to lie—we have to suspend our disbelief while reading inspirational romance. After all, in this genre, a happy ending for the couple is guaranteed, unlike in real life.
But between the couple’s first meeting and the final kiss, how realistic can we get?
Speaking for myself and what I write, there’s a tension between realism and my Christian and personal values.
In my own books, especially the ones set in Norway, I’ve bent demographic facts so there are far more Bible-believing Christians of marriageable age in my small town than you would realistically find. The actual statistics of church membership in Europe are so grim that you would really never find enough committed Christians to populate the small towns in Norway and England that I write about.
While I may massage demographic facts in order for my characters to exist in the settings where I place them, realism is important to me. I value rational plots and emotional responses that make sense.
We Don’t Talk About That…
There are topics that I deliberately avoid because they are theological landmines. I don’t write about women pastors, remarriage after divorce, how people keep (or don’t keep) the Sabbath, predestination, or cessationism vs. continuationism. While I hold views on these issues, they’re divisive topics and I don’t advertise my opinions. But I can still enjoy friendship and collaboration with authors who see things differently from me, and I’ll happily share their stories.
How Flawed is Too Flawed?
I’m a proud signatory of Story Embers’ Christian Storytellers Manifesto, part of a commitment to excellence in faith-based fiction. Among the pledges in the Manifesto is this one:
We resolve to craft characters who remain true to how flawed human beings live and act, affirming that Christian storytellers have the freedom to portray the full human experience in all its beauty and depravity, not to glorify or endorse sin but to accurately reveal the brokenness of the world.
Perfect characters make for boring stories. I like to show that even people who believe in Christian principles aren’t immune to human frailties. They have to overcome past mistakes and deal with personal weaknesses while staying true to their faith.
But at the same time, I restrict my stories to characters who are emotionally healthy enough to be in a relationship. I would be uncomfortable writing about a character riding off into the sunset to marry and potentially have children while they still have unaddressed psychological trauma. By the time the book hits “the end” I want to leave readers with the happy assurance that this couple is going to make it through the long haul.
How Much of a Past?
Following on from flawed characters, I also enjoy writing about people who have slightly messy pasts—but not too messy! I have written about characters who’ve struggled with addiction and sexual purity. These are among my favourite stories. But, so far, I’ve stopped short of portraying people who have been abusive. Redemption is absolutely possible even for those who’ve caused tremendous harm to others, but I don’t feel equipped to write a story about a former abuser finding forever love.
These lines are purely mine. It doesn’t mean I won’t read, enjoy, and recommend stories by other Christian authors who tread in places I will not go.
Are there lines of realism that you avoid when you’re reading or writing Christian romance?
I write fiction that reflects my Christian faith. I love happy endings, heroes and heroines who discover sometimes hard but always vital truths, and stories that uplift and encourage. My family and I live in the east of England where we enjoy rambling in the countryside, reading good books and making up silly lyrics to our favorite songs.
Yes! Bring on the tough subjects! The books that have most impacted my life are about people struggling with big questions, fears and doubts, and mistakes (both past and present). As a writer, my challenge is show the ravages of those mistakes with grace and compassion. And then we get to the rest of the story . . . the love of Christ, forgiveness and redemption.
Thoroughly enjoyed your blog!
Thanks, Victoria! “Show the ravages of those mistakes with grace and compassion”–I love how you put that.
I love how you write and I it’s appealing to shirk tough topics as a writer because we’re all so sensitive to offense, but we read to live through someone else and see how the POV handles their “stuff” and you’re good at portraying that.
I’ve always liked Francine Rivers for telling stories that show real hurt and damage and pain because that makes the redemption so much more powerful.
I admit, if it’s CF, and I like the author, I’ll read just about anything from that author! I’ll also admit there’s an author whose works I LOVED, until I read a book that was so very off theologically from what I believe, that I won’t read any of her books. I can’t even stand to go back and read her previous books, because she included some of those characters in the book I can’t stand, and now I can’t unread that. It has totally changed how I look at all of her books, and I can’t stand to read even new ones she’s written. I don’t mind gritty topics, after all, we deal with stuff every day and I get a new view of how to deal with some of it. I just want the theology to line up with the Bible, and honestly, that one author’s theology didn’t.
Aw, thanks, Dalyn. I love how you also tackle hard things, especially in your secret baby story, where you showed how the characters navigated through tricky waters, getting it wrong sometimes but ultimately finding their way.
Thanks, Trudy. I definitely have some theological red lines I won’t cross!
This is such an interesting post. I really enjoy inspirational romance – I’ve been reading sweet romance for many years and been a Christian all that time, but I only discovered Christian fiction existed a couple of years ago. I do find authors sometimes have different theological positions from me, but not in a way that has stopped me reading them.
I think it’s good to have realistic story lines, as you say, perfect people don’t exist in real life and I would much rather read about flawed but basically good characters. I avoid stories involving pregnancy loss but that’s a personal thing, I think writers who deal bravely and sensitively with difficult subjects are to be commended.
Thanks for you comment, Ruthie. You bring up a good point–some difficult subjects will be hard for people who have gone through similar struggles and feel that the topic hits too close to home. But it’s still important to address them all the same.
its interesting I know in Australia we are not classed as a Christian country and haven’t been for quite awhile although people would say were are. I also found in America the statistics go on church attendance and if you attend once a quarter you are considered a Christian for statistics and there are many people who only attend that much or even less but put down Christian. I know there are areas that are stronger than others. It’s the same everywhere.
I don’t want to read DV on the page but I think its good to address it in books. as in a new relationship with one character having been subjected to it prior and still healing (and it can be male or female as I know of a few men who were the victim). Susan Page Davis has a book where the sister of the hero is in this sort of situation (engaged to an abuser) and tries to leave and we see what lengths abusers go to. The abuse wasn’t on page what how the abuser was caught and ended in jail was. I find books like this helpful to understand but also in the hands of a victim may be what helps them to see the red flags in their own situation.
It’s the same with books that have a naracistic character like Narelle Atkins mother of the heroine in the Trinity Lakes books. We she how she gaslights and causes drama and its a hope people can see this isn’t normal. When you are a victim you think its normal and it can be as simple as hearing someone say things that an abuser does that can help you leave. It happened to a friend she was at somewhere to understand signs of a child being abused and when it came to the emotional and mental abuse. She said if thats abuse then I am a victim laughing. She went home and started to think on it and realised she was a victim, made a way to escape and got out of the situation with her children. So books can be a catalist for someone to get help even if its just the book causes a reader to talk about it to friends it may be that talk that helps the friend. So I do see a place for the harder hitting books. (But sometimes we need those that are just an easy read without angsts and drama)
When dealing with tough subjects you need to walk a tight rope. In many situations, subjects can be triggers for a lot of people. If they are dwelt with correctly, most people can handle reading about those subjects without having major problems with them. It is very hard in life for a lot of people who have dwelt with abuse. Thank you for sharing. God bless you.
Those are great points, Jenny! Your anecdote about your friend is especially thought-provoking.
I think it’s particularly important to write about “tricky” family relationships and show how Christians can deal with them with grace and love, but with firm boundaries in place.
Thanks, Debra. Handling these things correctly is so important. I’ve seen stories where subjects such as abuse are mentioned but trivialised or skimmed over, and that doesn’t sit right with me.
I think it’s a complicated topic, it depends a lot on the type of story being told and your demographic. For example, writing a YA Christian romance where the characters attend a private Christian school and are mostly believers can be extremely healthy and healthy and at the same time be realistic (my school environment when I was 17 was very healthy), A romance between two adult characters who go to church and have believing friends can be the same but it will be difficult to make a romance that avoids certain gritty themes if it is set in college for example, even I who chose to attend a small university rated as conservative in Chile where I have many companions from some branch of Christianity, I have seen and heard several things…drug addiction, many who choose to have a disordered sexual life, sexting, etc. Things that I’m sure many Christian authors would be uncomfortable writing.
However, there are parts of “realism” that can be avoided because it is really an excess of sin on the page and does not contribute anything and others that do not, for example…I definitely do not need to read a Christian romance where people choose to have sexual relations in the baths and the heroine finds out about it. I already have enough of that news. I don’t need it in my fiction, but I wouldn’t believe that really all the heroine’s and the hero’s friends don’t have sex, they don’t get drunk at parties or take drugs. heroine can choose not to go to those events of course but college is that type of environment that simply cannot be 100 percent “healthy”, Anyway, it’s curious…just look at pages like romance.io to see that touching on “difficult” topics glorifying evil is becoming very popular in the world of secular romance…the truth is I’m a little worried about what read girls my age…
You bring up a great point, Lilly, about the setting having an impact on the level of grit characters brush up against. I always love to read your thoughtful comments.
And I hear you loud and clear about evil being glorified in romance. Books that celebrate cruel, selfish, murderous, criminal men and promiscuous and deviant lifestyles are extremely popular. Definitely far more popular than the kinds of books our InspyRomance authors write.
Well, God has never been very popular; people prefer to read things that celebrate their inner darkness so they feel less guilty about it than books that expose it and encourage them to improve and get closer to God. The first requires work, the second requires humility.
True words indeed, Lilly.
It’s an interesting and thought provoking topic. Certainly there is a place for the grittier and tougher topics, though trigger warnings are important so people can be aware of the potential of retraumatisation or not, depending on where they are at. Interesting that a friend who writes non Christian works constantly receives one star reviews about too much sex in her books despite the warnings she places on the books. I think it’s important for a writer/reader to be true to their beliefs, though not impinge them on others, whatever those beliefs are.
Thanks, Dianne! You’re absolutely right.