Opposites might attract in both fiction and real life, but when the opposites are an author and one of her characters, things get tricky.
After all, how is an author to dream up ideas that are the opposite of her own? How does an author write about experiences she’s never had?
In To Believe In You, Matt Visser is on his best behavior because he wants to redeem himself in the eyes of his family and friends, but his craving for adventure sometimes lures him past the safety concerns that halt me in my tracks.
A careful rule-follower, I’m much more like the heroine, Lina Abbey. She learned early in life that taking risks could cost her the things she values most. Playing it safe has paid off in some ways—her grandparents trusted her enough to leave their fortune to her—but in her love life, she got burned despite her best intentions.
I knew I wanted to open the book by showing Matt’s daredevil side through Lina’s cautious perspective.
But my own cautious personality limited my ideas as I attempted to plan Matt’s opening stunt.
What’s an author to do?
We have a few options that include online research, signing up for experiences and tours, interviewing professionals, and visiting the library.
These ideas all have merit, but one of my favorite parts of writing characters unlike myself is getting input from loved ones with life experiences different from my own.
Enter my younger brother.
As a former Marine and a food truck owner with an employment history that involves a stereo equipment store and a gun shop, he has a very different skill set than me, making him a valuable resource when I’m trying to write characters like Matt and situations I’ve never navigated.
We kicked around a few possibilities for the opening scene until he named one that I spontaneously replied to with an incredulous, “That is such a bad idea.”
A dangerous idea. An idea that no one should attempt.
My brother replied, “Isn’t that the point?”
He was right, of course, so the stunt went into the opening scene of To Believe In You. And Matt pulls it off.
More or less.
The challenges in writing a character so different from myself were only just beginning, and finishing Matt’s story involved several more conversations with my brother. I’m trying to avoid spoilers here, but if you read it an get curious, message me and I’ll let you know which scenes needed his help… Although given what I’ve told you about him, you might be able to guess!
Other aspects of the story required help from others (and Google), but the extra hassle of writing about things I haven’t experienced seems to have paid off.
Some of my early readers commented that they liked how different Matt was from my other heroes. More adventurous and less settled, he certainly made for a fun character to write.
To Believe In You releases 10/17/22. Pre-order now so you can see Matt in action. Plus, earlier books in the series are part of the Back to School giveaways we’re doing here on Inspy Romance this month! Be sure to comment on the post to be entered.
What character have you loved, despite the fact that he or she is your opposite?
Emily Conrad writes contemporary Christian romance that explores life’s relevant questions. Though she likes to think some of her characters are pretty great, the ultimate hero of her stories (including the one she’s living) is Jesus. She lives in Wisconsin with her husband and their energetic coonhound rescue. Learn more about her and her books at emilyconradauthor.com.
Most characters I read are my opposite. I’d never find myself in their situations. That’s why I read these books.
That’s a great point. It’s fun to experience stories that are so unlike our lives!
Firstly I love your brothers comment isn’t that the point.
I am not sure of hand as so many would be different to me (for one they find someone and I am still single). I guess in many ways there are so many things I wouldn’t do but love seeing in books. I am a very fussy eater but in books I can appreciate the foods I probably don’t like (mostly). I can think of a few heroines or heros who seem to be full of angst or as constantly asking for advise only to ignore it so they can continue to wallow in pity.
My brother is fun to brainstorm with :)
I think you hit on a great point that characters are usually different from us in many ways, but that’s part of the fun–and part of how we can learn from them!
This is a really interesting thought – I know I always find it interesting to read about characters who have different outlooks from me, but I never thought about how it might be to write someone like that!
I often admire characters who take a risk or stand up for themselves, which is nothing like me, I’m awful with confrontation and quiet to a fault. For example, Elizabeth Bennett in ‘Pride and Prejudice ‘ – even though she’s wrong about Darcey, the way she stands up to him and tells him she will never marry him – I would have ended up apologising, or avoided seeing him altogether.
I also really admire characters in roles where they have to be confident and brave – characters who serve in the military, work for law enforcement or emergency services (both male and female) as I know I could never do those sort of jobs.
It’s great to think about what we admire about the characters who draw us in. I think that’s one way they can inspire us, even if we’re not quite ready to fully embrace whatever the trait is. Every little step in the right direction helps, right? :) Oh, and as someone who once fainted at the sight of blood, I know what you means about admiring those who serve in certain jobs. I’m so grateful for those who can and do!
A lot of the characters are different or opposite from me , from where they live and the jobs they hold. I think that is why I like reading about them so much. It’s fun to imagine their lives.
Yes! I enjoy that too. I suppose that’s why my series is about rock stars. Very different from my own life, even before Matt took center stage, but lots of fun for me to imagine!
How exciting to stretch outside your boundaries and write a character so different from what comes naturally! Maybe you should dedicate the book to your brother!
You know, I am still working on the dedication. I’ll have to consider that!
Sounds like a fun story! Your brother sounds like my 9 year old. He’s been seeking adventure since he learned to crawl and my heart hasn’t stopped being concerned since.
Adventurous characters are fun in fiction, but I can only imagine the concern an adventurous child would bring to his (or her!) mom’s heart! But I’m sure he brings a lot of joy too :)
Most characters are different from me as I’m a homebody and I can have adventures all over the world through travel.
I love that about fiction! I’m mostly a homebody too.
Most of the characters I read about are different from me.
Makes sense! Even when they have some similar traits (like me and Lina), there can be some big differences (I’m not an heiress, but she is!).
There are way more characters NOT like me than like me!! I like reading about characters that do way more than I will!!
They can inspire us right out of our comfort zones sometimes! Or… make us glad we never have to do what they do. Ha!
Hi, how awesome that your brother helped you out with ideas, I love your book cover. I find myself like a lot of the book characters I read, but then I also find alot that are just the opposite of me, I just love reading about all different characters. Have a great rest of the week and stay safe.
Thank you! I’m pretty partial to this cover too :) It can be nice to have that blend between similar and different characters. The similar ones serve as a point of connection, and the different ones are an adventure!
I can’t think of any characters right now, but I know that I have definitely read books with characters who are my opposite. I love reading about different characters and their different personalities but sometimes if they are too different from me then I am not able to connect with them.
I know what you mean. The differences are fun, but a few points of commonality help us connect with characters!
No specific books come to mind right now, but pretty much any character who is a risk taker or is impulsive tend to challenge me. I like reading books with characters so different from myself though, it helps me see from a different perspective and maybe learn something too.
I love your perspective about how characters who are different from us can challenge us!
I have read many books with characters far different from me. The more I work with and get to know authors, the more I respect you all! I have been so impressed with how well these characters so different from the writers are portrayed. I have changed a great deal from the way I used to be–thanks to our awesome, forgiving Savior and a few great mentors. When I read about some of who I used to be and have so many intricate details be spot-on, I know that author did meticulous research. I love watching these characters learning and growing in spite of how they may have been introduced in the book. Not only does my respect for the writer grow but I know how many people God can touch through these books, even if it is a fictional story! Hats off to you creative, talented writers! And to those siblings like your brother who work with you to develop ideas Emily!
What a wonderful testimony of what God has done! You bring up two of the most touching compliments an author can get (at least in my opinion): 1) God touched me through your book, and 2) I’ve been there and you got it right. So grateful for readers like you who value those things <3
Thank you! I accepted Christ when I was young & lived the life God blessed me with & my parents raised me to as well. Then I turned my back on Him for many years. I married an unsaved man, we had a daughter and I continued to spiral down until I truly hit rock bottom. The blessing in that is that He was waiting and accepted me back home with arms wide open! I will always live with consequences for my poor choices as will my children but the blessing is having the ability to understand what others are going through in a way I never would have had the opportunity to otherwise. I can’t possibly express how awesome God is & all the amazing ways He not only has but continues to bless me every single day! I can’t begin to tell you how special it is to read so many great books but some truly amazing authors. The ways God uses these books to touch so many readers is something I would not be able to experience if my life had not taken all of the twist and turns it has, such a special gift I love having a part in, as small as it is. What an amazing God we serve!
Thank you so much for sharing more of your story! Amen!
a lot of characters are opposite of me. I think that is why I really like them. then I find one like myself and I fall in love again with another character
There is something that draws us to characters unlike ourselves, isn’t there? :)
I think that’s the beauty of reading books. You get to experience things that you wouldn’t otherwise from characters that are your complete opposite. I can’t remember one specifically, but since I consider myself an introvert, anyone that’s an extrovert or has a witty comeback makes me instantly like them. :)
I’m an introvert too, and I too like extroverts (I married one!), so I totally get this! :)
My husband and I are exact opposites. If you look in the dictionary for opposite, the definition is “Bonnie and Larry “. And he IS a character!! 😅
Haha, oh, I love this! <3 Sounds like a perfect match. :)
Its so cool that your brother helped you out in writing the book. If I read a book where the character is all romantic and mushy like, that’s not me at all. I guess I’ve gotten burned too many times.
Sounds to me like you and Lina would get along–I’d say she’s more leery than mushy herself. And there are levels of mushiness that would be too much for me too. :)
Love the post and I have read books that the character sounds like me but not too much ! Thank you for sharing this amazing post have a great day!
Thanks for stopping by, Sarah!
Jude Strong from Tacos for Two by Betsy St. Amant. Thank you for sharing. God bless you.
I just got that one on audio! Looking forward to it!
can’t think of any now
Opposites attract is one of my favorites. This story has characters with flaws and redeeming qualities.
Glad to hear it’s a favorite! I definitely try to strike a balance between flaws and strong traits.
I like reading about opposite attract my mom and dad are opposites and my dad’s brother does same stuff as my mom so they joke and say they never could of been married since they do stuff the same.It seems to me that relationships work good if u r opposite or at least in my family.
I agree, Kendra! I married my opposite too, and our differences tend to compliment each other.
Lately I have been wanting to read about older characters–not those in their 20s and 30s. It reminds me too much of my son’s age group!
I can see how that would be a case that led you to want to read characters who are more like yourself!
Ummm James Bond would be one character totally opposite of me, but I love him
Ha! Great pick. Total of opposite of me too!
I love to read about extroverts because I’m opposite of them 😂
I hear you there, Natalya!