I promise you that the title of this post was not clickbait. :) According to a couple of my readers, I have written books with unlikeable heroines. Let me give you a few examples of what their reviews said:
“I didn’t like (the heroine) very much, for a Christian, she was too judgemental.”
“(The heroine) was so unlikeable! God loves her anyway so I suppose it served its purpose to reflect that.”
“I have to admit I had a hard time relating to (the heroine), so I couldn’t grasp why (the hero) was so drawn to her.”
Now, I’ll gladly admit that my skin has grown thicker since I became an author and I know not everyone will (or has to) like my stories. So, thankfully, these reviews didn’t bother me too much. They did, however, make me think. Are the leading women I’ve written really as unlikeable as these readers say? After some reflection, I realized, why yes, they are! And you know what? I’m perfectly fine with that.
I’m perfectly fine with writing heroines who are loud-mouthed, standoffish, hardened, uptight, and stubborn. (By the way, these are all words other reviewers have used to describe my heroines. LOL). I aim to write female characters who have made mistakes, been hurt, and are broken. They have real problems and aren’t perfect, by any means. So, why do I write such unlikeable heroines? For these three reasons: I like creating characters that (hopefully some) readers can relate to; to show a character’s growth throughout a story; and lastly, because it means so much more when a hero loves a heroine in spite of her flaws.
Which is exactly like how God loves us, even with our brokenness.
As it says in Romans 5:8 (NIV): “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
This is why I write unlikeable heroines, so that readers will understand that while we may be unlikeable at times, we are never unloveable.
What kind of heroines do you prefer reading about? Please share in the comments below. I look forward to reading your answers!
A chauffeur and referee by day (AKA a stay at home mom of two), Liwen Y. Ho writes inspirational and sweet romance infused with heart, humor, and a taste of home (her Asian roots).
I like relatable heroines and I like flaws. For example I can relate to someone who comes from a poorer family where as a rich heiress to me is a struggle or the rich city life its not relatable to me.
I do struggle with judgemental heroines partly due to having lower self esteem and feeling judged due to having a brother who was good at everything and in the popular group etc. I wasn’t I wasn’t good at sport or school or in the it crowd but people would say things like your brother could do something so you should be able to etc. So I don’t like judgemental characters unless they change at some stage.
I like heroines that are interesting. I do need to have a vested interest in them. Too unlikeable and I will be turned off.
Characters that are real are perfect in their imperfections
I love this so much! Maybe that’s why I love your heroines. I, too, enjoy the ones others find “unlikable.” I want variety as a reader, and to write realistic character (flaws and all) as an author. And my favorite part of your post—we may be unlikable but never unlovable. YES!! Yet another way we’re kindred spirits, Liwen! Thank you for this!
I like characters who are flawed, and trying to find their way. None of us are perfect, and I like books to reflect that. I just finished a book that I’d have really liked to have smacked upside the head, she was so dense! It was the last chapter before I decided she was on the right track, but I still wanted to smack her. I prefer characters I can relate to more than ones I want to smack upside the head, though! Of course, I also had to remind myself that she’s only 20ish, and a bit a spoiled brat, anyway, and that was part of the problem. I like reading books where the characters are more mature, no matter what their age may be. However, it also reflects our times, as it seems it is taking much longer for the younger ones to mature, in some cases!
I’ve written a few unlikeable heroines myself, so I’ve seen reviews like that, too. Every character needs to have issues to work on, and everyone the same would be boring! But I do try to make them relatable even if they aren’t always “nice!”
But God loves us anyway. Such a solid, beautiful truth!
I like heroines with flaws, heroines that may not be popular, and especially heroines who are not pretty. Those kind of women I can relate to. That’s what I did with the heroine Morgan in my “Love is” series. However, I don’t want the main character to be too unlikeable, too mean, because then I won’t care enough about her to want her to change. So it’s a fine balance.
I like a heroine who’s independent, yet knows when she needs help and is humble enough to accept it, a bit stubborn, but yet knows when she’s gone too far and needs to consider compromising, who knows who she is and what she wants, but yet doesn’t want to hurt feelings along the way (or if she does, apologize). I kind of described myself! I don’t like a simpering female role who’s so helpless that she can’t do anything for herself or compromises just to make the other person happy (a doormat). I also like a heroine who’s real, yes, she makes mistakes & stumbles along the way. But I love a redeemable character, one who relies on God to help change her & relies on His strength to get through life. Same for a hero…one who is human, but yet knows he needs the Lord…who can’t live life without Him. :-) Because I need to see characters like myself & how they handle what life throws them. One who stands firm in their faith & won’t back down when an injustice happens or water down the truth.
I could go on and on, but I hope what I said makes sense. I want to feel like I could make a friend with the heroine…in spite of flaws or things I might disagree with. And also one who I can sharpen iron with when it comes to my faith walk!
Hi Ausjenny! I’m so sorry you had to deal with other people’s comparisons. That’s really not fair. I hope you know you are uniquely and wonderfully made by God and that no one else could replace you in this world. When I feel down on myself, I remember that there was never and will be never be anyone just like me in this world. That’s the same for you! Thank you for reading and sharing. Hugs!
Hi Mary! Yes, you make a good point about needing to have a vested interest. Or else it would be hard to root for them. Thanks for reading and commenting!
Hi Yvonne! Well said. :) Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
Hi Jaycee! Kindred spirits, indeed! :) Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
Hi Trudy! Haha, I so understand what you’re saying. Sometimes I want to shake some sense into characters, too. I guess that goes to show that the author really did a good job in portraying them. ;) Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
Hi Valerie! Whew, that makes me feel better to hear you say you’ve seen similar reviews. :) But yes, it would be boring if there was nothing for the character to overcome. Thanks for commenting!
Hi Lila! Your heroines sound like ones I would enjoy. And you’re right, it is a fine balance that we authors need to work hard at to bring to a story. Thanks for reading and commenting!
Hi Trixi! Wow, so much yes! I really love your last paragraph and the heart behind it. Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
This can be a very challenging discussion. Why do I read a particular genre or author or even a specific book? What makes me enjoy a book or a character? Those are complex questions largely because of the incredible diversity with which God has created us. I read Christian romance largely for escape. I want to spend time away from my everyday life because it contains some hardships that I would rather avoid right now. I want to enjoy happy endings. I want to see people listen to and then live out God’s direction. It encourages me when I see (or read about) someone who can overcome trials, trusting God because that’s what I need to do. If the characters had no flaws, there would be nothing to overcome.
Having said that, the spectrum of personalities and trials is overwhelmingly broad. I think this is where the idea of literary genres comes from. A genre is formed by a set of expectations that readers look for when facing that huge sea of possibilities in an effort to find stories that will speak to them. Given the number of different combinations, it’s a wonder that we don’t all run screaming for the hills at the very thought of trying to write stories that will attract an audience. You can see the attempt, though, when you consider the way Amazon talks about book categories: “This lovely romance is #1 in the Billionaire cowboy marriage of convenience in a small town on the Oregon coast when the heroine arrives on a holiday weekend after losing a loved one in a senseless act of violence category. You’re sure to be pleased.” The one where the loved one is lost to a catastrophic illness is, of course, a separate category. :)
I say God bless you, Liwen, for creating characters that show the truth of the richness of God’s creation and His overcoming love lived out in lives that are not perfect. That is the fallen world we live in and that is the only true and abiding hope that we have.
I like to read about heroines that I can relate to. That means real life problems and situations. I really don’t understand why there are so many books about billionaires now. I like characters that are real and that you meet everyday in life.
Hi Lincoln! I gotta say, you had me LOL-ing at the Amazon book description you made up (which is truly not far from reality)! :) Thank you for your words of encouragement! I appreciate hearing your thoughts.
Things are much better now but as a child and youth when you are constantly compared with a sibling who is so out going and good at things its hard and we need to make sure all the children are praised for something and not compared.
I also know when you have a low self esteem for any reason (I was also bullied which affected me) you tend to want to blend in and not have the attention on you. I am much better now although I still have times have that sensitive side. Like when I make a mistake in the newsletter at church and one person makes sure I know about it. (he has now been told to no longer contact me if there is an error but to contact the pastor). So a character is judgemental I can find harder to like but would hope by the end of the book they have been convicted of what they are doing and we see the change and how it happened. This then does two things one shows people like me it can happen but it also may help someone who identifies with this behaviour may also be convicted of being so judgemental and it may be the catalyst for change too.
Hi Kathleen! Yes, I like relatable characters, too. Thanks for reading and commenting!
I like relatable characters.
Hi Denise! Yes, I think those are the best. Thanks for reading and commenting!
I think the crucial difference is between who a character is and their behaviour, just like in real life. Then there are fantasy tropes like prices/billionaires which are pure escapism. I prefer characters who reject the diversity of real people.
Yes, I agree. I do appreciate it when characters change and grow through the course of a book.
Hi Dianne! That’s true. A person can change their behavior, both in real life and in stories. Thanks for reading and commenting!